I’ve been dreaming of things yet to come. Living, learning, watching, burning. Eyes on the sun.

I’ve been dreaming of things yet to come. Living, learning, watching, burning. Eyes on the sun. by pinklipstiiick featuring bond no.9 perfume

I relaxed on the blanket with my eyes closed, feeling Seb's warm body shifting beside me on the blanket we were sharing. Central park surrounding us in that amazing spring day, leaving me feeling like everything in my life had finally fallen into place and I was finally happy. I had my gorgeous man, my career was doing great, and in just a week I'd be done filming the movie I was currently working on.
"Are you sleeping?" He asked quietly.

I lifted my hand to shield my eyes from the sun, smiling at him immediately, "What do you think?"

"You might be talking in your sleep," He grinned as he bent over to kiss me chastely, still not big on public displays of affection but we were working on it. It was much easier to go unrecognized here than in LA where we had paparazzi following us constantly. I couldn't really blame him for hating the attention, but I liked showing my boyfriend off. And who could blame me for that? He was hands down the sexiest man alive.

"Do I?" I asked against his soft lips before he pulled away, my eyes not moving from him even when he laid back down beside me.

"You do," He said simply, keeping his head turned in my direction as he smirked. "You always say how amazing I am and how I'm always right."

I rolled my eyes but grinned, "Lies."

He kept quiet a few moments, closing his eyes and enjoying the sun on his skin. How content he looked like this, it made me think of summer and the plans he was already working on. I couldn't wait. "Did you bring it?" He asked out of nowhere, peeking one eye open.

"What?" I blinked at him, absolutely clueless.

"The book?" He said back, having reminded me a dozen of times to bring it before we left his hotel room. The infamous 50 shades trilogy, a book they were turning into a movie and had offered Seb the chance to direct it.

I nodded with a huge smirk on my face, lifting myself into a sitting position and reaching for my bag. "I did yes. I even marked my fave parts," I said as I took the book out, crossing my legs Indian style.

"Read them to me," He smirked back at me and stretched out an arm, wrapping it around my hips.

I tried to ignore his hard body against mine and the fact that I was planning on reading what sounded a lot like porn. Then I remembered which parts I chose and I couldn't wait to see how he'd react. "Okay," I bit down on my lip, trying to keep a straight face which was not an easy task. "Let's start with this," I  announced and cleared my throat, "You beguile me, Christian. Completely overwhelm me. I feel like Icarus flying too close to the sun."

He cut me off, raising one eyebrow at me as he shot me an amused look, "Now I see why he makes you think of me."

I held my hand up, "Wait to say that, you might change your mind...listen." I paused again, going to another page which was even better. Honestly, I had no idea how this book became such a hit. "He holds out his hand, and in his palm are two shiny silver balls linked with a thick black thread … Inside me! I gasp, and all the muscles deep in my belly clench. My inner goddess is doing the dance of the seven veils … Oh my …" I started reading again, my grin even wider as I struggled not to giggle like a silly school girl. "It’s a curious feeling. Once they’re inside me, I can’t really feel them—but then again I know they’re there … Oh my." And there it was when I started laughing, my head tossing back in the process that he couldn't help but laugh too.

"Oh dear god," He said between the laughter, still looking at me as he shook his head, complete happiness on his face that left me feeling like the luckiest girl alive. "I love you Ar," The words came out of his mouth so spontaneously, so unexpected.

My finger ran over the top of the book as my eyes remained locked on his, my heart pounding fast even if I always knew his feelings for me. It was one thing to feel it and another to hear it. I grinned slowly, wanting to toss the book aside and take him there, hear him tell me he loves me while being buried inside of me... but we were in a very public place and he was really against that sort of thing. "I know it," I said and grinned, letting him know that I was only being silly. I mean, the last time I had told him the same thing and he gave me a kiss back in response? It started a fight. "I'm glad you feel that way," I joked again, remembering how he'd said that back a different time.

His hand fell down to my ass and he spanked it lightly, parting his lips as I leaned all of my body weight into him and kissed him hard. My tongue slipped into his mouth first, a moan escaping me when he reciprocated to deepen the kiss. I couldn't even explain how long I'd been waiting to hear those three words leave his mouth. "Uhm," He responded with his lips still pressed against mine.

"I love you too," I smiled against his lips and pulled my head back to see his handsome face again. The book wedged between us as I wrapped an arm around him to play with his hair.

"You make it hard to control myself when you do that," He said and I bit my lip, pressing my hips against his.

"When I tell you that I love you or when I throw myself at you?" I asked innocently.

He reached for my wrist, pulling it away from his hair and up to his mouth, biting on my skin a little less than gently. Dear god, everything he did was sexy. "Both," He said quietly, looking lost in a deep thought. Then again, when didn't he? He was a genius, a man who literally amazed me with everything he did. He was a perfectionist and it showed... plus he was all mine. 

"I should stop then," I said, still grinning as he freed my wrist and I let my hand drop onto his hard chest, my fingers itching to go lower.

"You couldn't."

I nodded, "You're right. Guess what?"

"You're wet?" He grinned and I laughed.

"I'm always wet when I'm around you... but that's not what I meant," I said seriously, keeping my eyes on his. His dark brown eyes were scanning my face carefully, always looking as if they could read my every thought. "I finish filming next week."

His eyebrow shot up since I wasn't supposed to finish until next month and then we'd make plans for summer... only my plans had changed a little more. "Then what?"

"Then I plan on coming here until you finish the boring cloud movie," I shrugged with a forced smirk, not wanting to show the nervousness I felt. For someone always so sure of herself, he brought out a vulnerable side to me that I never even knew I had. "And after that? We'll figure it out together... I'm going to take a year off from movies."

He stared at me, speechless for a second because he was the type who liked to have everything planned out... and this? This was kind of me springing it on him at the last moment. But it wasn't supposed to be a burden, the opposite really. I'd have a year free to do whatever I wanted, to spend all the time with him that I could. It wasn't a bad thing. "Why?" He asked eventually, struggling to get a grip.

I shrugged, my nervousness finally surfacing when I started twirling my hair around my finger. "I made three movies in the last year, I feel like I need a break," I answered simply, leaving out the part that I missed him. Traveling back and forth between Chicago and New York was one thing, but once I finished I'd go back home to LA and that flight would be a lot harder.

"True, you did a great job," He nodded in agreement, looking genuinely happy for me and my career. Honestly, I knew he was. He wrapped an arm around my shoulder as he adjusted his back on the blanket and glanced at me, "I'm proud of you."

"I'm proud of you too," I smiled and allowed myself to relax a little, adjusting my cheek on his shoulder and letting him kiss my lips quickly.

He took a few more seconds to let my words soak in, "What do you want to do?"

I ran my hand up and down his chest, my eyes following his as they stared at the blue sky, "I was thinking that maybe I could take classes." I paused, still unsure myself, "Not full time though."

"It's a great idea babe," He glanced down to smile at me as he ran his fingers up and down my arm mindlessly.

I smiled back at him before snuggling closer and closing my eyes, silently wondering where his mind was. "What will you do instead?" I asked curiously.

"I guess it depends on this movie, if I decide to accept that's probably what I'll be doing for the next months," He replied then paused, lost in a thought.

"In Seattle?" I asked, knowing that it was the books location and while most of it could be filmed in LA, they'd probably have to spend more than a few months in Seattle as well.

"Again, I don't know," He took a deep breath, nerves in his own voice and making me feel nervous all over again. "If I said yes to the movie...would you come with me or not?"

I allowed my eyes to flutter open again, finding his staring up at the sky. I studied his expression briefly, finding not even a hint at his true feelings. I didn't want to become one of those needy girls who spent her entire life following her boyfriend... but it wasn't like that with us. Not at all. I wanted to spend time with my man, yes, but I felt like I had earned it. "I was assuming I would..." I trailed off, uncertainty in my tone. "Do you want me to?"

He looked down at me and smiled, maybe a little forced but a smile none the less. "Are you sure that's what you want?" He asked instead and I felt a heavy feeling in my chest.

"Do you not want me to?" I rephrased my question, still searching his eyes for what he wasn't saying.

"I want the best for you Ar," He said honestly and I let out a breath of relief. "You're already putting your career on hold, I don't want you to do the same with the rest of your life."

I nodded understanding where he was coming from, "I can take classes online... I can study wherever I am, whether it's at home or in Seattle with you."

"But it's not the same," Came his response and I sighed, careful with the way I worded things since I didn't want to scare him away. I mean, we'd just gotten to the point where we told each other 'I love you.' I wasn't ready to move back home to Los Angeles and hope that one of us had a free day to travel to visit the other. Of course a six hour flight was manageable, but to constantly be flying back and forth? That was a nightmare.

"I mean, I don't have to be in Seattle the entire time..." I trailed off and felt my skin flush, knowing this wasn't going the way I had expected. I thought he'd be thrilled. "But I want to spend my free time with you, yes."

He unwrapped his arm from around me and rolled over onto his side, propping himself on his elbow as he set his head against his hand. As well as I knew this man? Sometimes he was so hard to read. "I want to spend my free time with you too," He said, looking into my eyes.

"So..." I trailed off, waiting for him to add more since I felt so lost, so confused by where this conversation was going. I didn't want to lose him, I felt like I had far too many times and I promised myself it would never happen again.

"So I'll be more than happy if you decide to come to Seattle or wherever I'll be." He paused, using his free hand to push my hair behind my ear, "Only I want you to take this decision not for me only, for yourself too. I'll be busy filming-"

"I know that," I cut hi, off, turning my head a little to stare at him. He really was gorgeous, flawless even. The idea of packing up my things and following him to Seattle scared me. I was always independent, even as a child when I chose my career path and left most of my family to pursue my dreams. The idea of depending so heavily on Seb? It was all new for me... but I knew that he was worth it.

"And I won't be able to stay with you all day everyday, still I don't want to fly back and forth across the States every weekend," He went on, the logic part of him always dominating the rest.

I nodded slowly, knowing what he meant because we already had done that for the last few months and even if that was better than nothing it was also exhausting. "I don't want that either," I said quietly and honestly, needing a break from the small but worthy trips.

"But while I work I want you to have something to do, I don't want you to get to the point where you're so bored that you regret your decision, whatever it will be," He said in one breath as he reached for my hand and held it in his.

"I'm good at keeping myself busy," I said honestly and he raised an eyebrow at me. I grinned and leaned my body back into his, not wanting to argue about our future even though we necessarily weren't. Being all lovey didn't come natural to us, but we were trying. "Nothing dirty, although if you're making a movie that's practically porn? I might be turned on all the time..."

"I won't allow you on the set," He said with a serious face, cracking a smile only when my mouth fell open.

"I believe it," I replied and nuzzled his neck before he could beat me to it. With a hand in his hair and my face hidden, I felt safe, like I could say anything on my mind. I kissed him instead and cherished the moment, the sudden silence between us and how good it felt being in his arms. It scared me that I felt like I was falling harder and harder for him every day, because what more was there than love? "I'm afraid you'll get tired of me if I'm around all the time," I whispered against his skin, the vulnerability I felt making my skin flush.

He set his hand on my waist, playing with the bottom of my shirt before sliding his hand under it to rest on my skin. I felt myself holding my breath, waiting for his answer. "Never," He finally said.

I pulled my head back to look at him again, his face never giving anything away. My man was a complete mystery and I found that so incredibly sexy. "I'd never regret my decision if it meant spending more time with you," I said honestly.

"I hope so."

I smiled more genuinely and pressed a soft kiss against his lips while playing with his hair, "There are plenty of things I can do to keep me busy... school, I can take up yoga, maybe teach underprivileged students English," I shrugged, tearing my eyes away from his and glancing down at his lips.

"See you're too smart to do nothing with yourself," He said with a smile, looking at me with a serious look that let me know he meant every word. "I like all of your ideas."

"Yeah?" I asked casually, distracted by those lips, especially when he spoke.

"Stop that," He said with a laugh.

I furrowed my eyebrows, giving him a confused look as I finally made eye contact again, "What? I'm doing nothing."

"You keep looking at my lips, it distracts me," He explained quietly, his smile still in place as traced circles against my soft skin with his thumb.

"It's not my fault, they're distracting me," I said back and bit back a smirk, nuzzling closer to my man before tilting my head back and making it obvious that I wanted to be kissed. And so he did, pressing his mouth against mine firmly, lingering a moment until I was smiling wide. "Now, what were you saying?" I  added, getting back to the conversation since I got exactly what I wanted.

"I was saying that you should do whatever you want to." He paused, looking like he wanted to add a second part. I understood that it was hard for him to open up, but it was obvious that he was trying. It was all I could ask for. "While you'll be with me."

I lifted myself up into a sitting position, crossing my legs Indian style before allowing him to set his head in my lap. Thank god I wasn't wearing a skirt because if I was tempted before? It'd be even worse with him like this. "I'll find something..." I trailed off as I smiled wider, my head bowing down to keep my eyes on him as I traced every bone of his face with the tip of my index finger. His features were flawless, like he should have gone into modeling over anything else. "We still have time."

"True," He said quietly as he kept the eye contact, perfectly content with how things were going. We had even managed to talk about something important without arguing or fighting, I was proud of us. "We'll see if I'll decide to do this movie."

I nodded in agreement and bent over him, my hair cascading around his face as I kissed him softly, not able to resist. "We shall," I added quietly before straightening myself up again, my fingers back on his face as I played with his scruff, loving the way it felt.

"Where did you say you want to go this summer?" He asked out of nowhere, reminding me of his promise to take me somewhere hot.

I wrinkled my nose, sliding my hand down to cup his chin before pressing a kiss against his soft lips. One kiss wasn't enough of course, so I had to sneak another. "Australia," I said in my best accent, it coming out more British than anything.

"Australia or Britain?" He grinned, turning his head to a side and nipping at my wrist.

"Australia," I said and gave him a nod and a grin. The idea of laying out in the sun next to my man, both of us wearing next to nothing? The thought alone did things to my body... that's how crazy I was about him. Plus his head so close to my pussy, that was distracting enough as it was. "Have you been before?"

"I have," He said and closed his eyes, looking so peaceful and handsome.

"Of course... my man has been everywhere," I grinned, knowing how lucky I was to be so young and already have gone to a dozen of places. The thing was, I wanted to go everywhere. I wanted to live my life carefree, having fun while visiting places with the man I loved. Nothing sounded better.

He grinned with his eyes still closed, relaxing as my fingers caressed his cheek, "You haven't gone?"

"Not yet," I moved my fingers to his hair, running them through it. "But this summer that'll change."

"I'm going to fall asleep if you keep doing that..." He trailed off in a quiet tone, my eyes moving to his chest and watching it rise and fall.

"Is it relaxing?" I asked just as quietly and when he nodded, I grinned. "I'll watch you sleep then."

He peeked an eye open and let his grin match mine, "Creepy."

"Would you rather me wake you up?" I slid a hand down his chest, letting my fingers cup him through his jeans, "Because I can think of a few ways I could wake you up..."

"Ar," He groaned as both eyes opened, on me instantly. I leaned my head down to kiss his forehead, lifting it back up and scanning the park. Here, we were no one... just a couple in love. It was nice not having a million eyes on us, but I knew where Seb's head always was, half expecting a photographer to jump out of a bush to take a few pictures of us. "Have you spoken to your sister recently?"

I shook my head, not sure where that had come from, "No. Have you?"

"I saw her a week ago."

That was news to me. "Oh," I said, trying to mask the surprise in my tone. The thing with my sister was... well, I wasn't sure. We didn't necessarily not get along, but we hadn't been close since we were little. I loved her, of course I loved her. She was my only sister and what little family I had left. This gap between us? I wanted to close it, but she always made it hard. "How was she?"

"She's fine." He paused as he scanned my face carefully, trying to see where my emotions were since you never really knew where my sister and I stood. "She said she misses you."

I bit down on my lip, "Still she doesn't even call me to know if I'm fine."

He lifted himself up in a sitting position and turned to me, grabbing me by the ankles to pull my body closer to his. "I told her that you are, since you're with me now," He said with a smirk, making the moment light again or at least attempting to. The fact that my sister called Seb still and invited him over but hadn't called me in months? It hurt.

I glared at him when I almost lost my balance, reaching for his arms before falling backwards. "So now she knows we're back together?" I asked as I wrinkled my nose.

He set my legs by each side of his hips, crossing his as he lifted my ass to set me back down on his lap a second later. "She does and she doesn't seem too thrilled." He paused and made a face, not that he really cared about any ones opinion but the fact that everyone thought we were doomed to fail? It had to bother him. "She thinks I'll be the usual asshole."

I cupped his gorgeous face and smiled, leaning into him as I wrapped my legs around his waist loosely. His body, dear god is was tempting me. "If you were too good I'd get bored anyway," I joked, my voice coming out low and soft while my smile turned into a grin.

"Hey, I'm being a saint!" He protested as he closed the small distance between us and kissed me, his hands dropping onto my ass in the process.

"Saint Sebby," I smirked against his lips, staring into his dark eyes.

He rolled his eyes but smirked with me, "I'm sure I'll go to hell instead."

I grinned and watched him shake his head, getting the feeling that he was holding something back from me. Years with him then years spent apart, I still knew this man like the back of my hand. "Heaven sounds boring anyway," I shrugged and kissed him again, this time a little harder and making him groan quietly.

"There's one more thing about your sister," He said as he pulled his head back regretfully, looking nervous and only making me worry also. I just stared at him, sliding my hands down his chest while I waited for him to tell me whatever it was that he was hiding from me. "She's fucking Gavin."

I tilted my head to a side, keeping my eyes on him as I tried digesting that little bit of information. My sister. And Gavin. My best friend and Amelia. They hated each other... it was obviously a joke, and a bad one at that. "Funny," I said in a monotone, my eyes scanning his face which was still dead serious.

"Ar," He started and cut his own words off, it kind of hitting me then.

My sister and my best friend.

"Sebastian," I retorted, still trying to make sense of this. He said he saw her what, a week ago? None of this made sense, not just the fact that Mills and Gavin were together... but the part where no one told me about it when everyone in my life seemed to know.

He let out a sigh and moved his hands from my ass to my hips, knowing that my mood had shifted... but what did he expect? "I wanted to tell you, but -"

"But you didn't!" I cut him off, trying to pull back but those strong arms I adored? They were seriously strong and keeping me in place. "Let me go right now."

He shook his head and kept his hands firmly planted on my hips, "I'm not letting go until you listen to me." I narrowed my eyes on him and tried to take a deep breath, trying to figure out who I was the most pissed off at. "Amelia was supposed to tell you. And honestly? She should have been the one to."

I bit my lip and nodded my head, seeing his point there. "So you decided to hide it from me... for a week," I said in a quiet voice, remembering calling Gavin a week ago and my call being sent straight to voicemail. Now I could see why. So many god damn secrets, it was like high school all over again.

"Do you seriously think that I wanted to hide that from you?" He asked in a louder tone, shaking his head in disbelief. "This is Gavin we're talking about. I hate him. I would never risk losing you or having you mad at me over that idiot."

I closed my eyes and leaned my head against his shoulder, breathing in his intoxicating scent while trying to relax. "I'm not mad at you. I wish you would have told me sooner... but I can't be mad at you for that. My sister put you in a bad position and you wanted to do the right thing," I reasoned out loud, not mad about my sister fucking my best friend. I tried hooking them up years ago, maybe as a joke, but still. It was the secrets, the lies. I might have been a bad friend throughout the past year, an even worse track record as a sister... but I didn't deserve that, did I? I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt.

He ran his fingers through my hair, playing with it as he kissed the top of my head and wrapped an arm around my waist. Despite the shitty mood I was currently in, he had the perfect way of making me feel loved and wanted. "I gave her one week to tell you herself, that's why I waited," He explained quietly.

"You would've tell me sooner? I mean, if you didn't want me to hear it from her," I asked in a small voice, turning my head a little against his chest and looking up at him through my lashes. I believed him. I knew that he never wanted to see me hurt or upset.

He nodded his head, not needing to think about it twice. "Of course babe, I'd never keep anything from you," He said seriously, lifting his hand and brushing his thumb against my cheek.

I bit down on my lip as I wrapped my arms loosely around his waist, closing us in an embrace since I needed to feel his perfect body up against mine. "Never?" I asked, always looking for reassurance. I was a strong girl, still when it came to Seb I had my weaknesses.

"Never," He smiled at me, showing his protective and gentle side. No wonder I was so crazy about him. "I know better than making you mad."

"True," I said as a small smile appeared on my lips, grinning as he tilted his head down and kissed me softly. "Why she didn't tell me though? A week was long enough..." I trailed off as I broke the kiss, my head still resting against his chest and my body pressed against his as if I was a koala.

"Because she's stupid?" He said back and raised one eyebrow, getting nothing but a glare out of me. "Because Gavin is stupid?"

"Seb," I said flatly, not amused even a bit. I was curious and wanted to know what was going on in my sisters head, why she was so afraid of me finding out that she asked my own boyfriend to lie to me... that was the worst part of it all.

"She said you'd get mad over them hooking up," He explained with a shrug, "And since we have this no hiding things from each other policy? I'm glad that they did because at least now that idiot will have another reason to stay away from you," He added, the thought alone making him groan. He had never approved my friendship with Gavin and made no secret of it. The two men hated each other, both of them always wanting to protect me. Truth was, I was lucky to have both of them... to feel so loved. The way they made it impossible to be in a room together at the same time though? That part sucked.

I sighed and kept my body pressed against, slipping a hand under the back of his shirt and running my fingertips up and down his smooth skin. "I wish you two got along," I said seriously, not wanting them to be best friends or even close... I just didn't want them to hate each other. It was draining and put me in the worst position.

"Are you mad over them hooking up?" Seb ignored my words like I knew he would, just like I knew him and Gavin would never become all buddy-buddy.

"No," I replied honestly, grinning as I pressed a soft kiss against the front of his neck. "I think they're perfect for each other instead."

"Both idiots? Yeah, I agree," He said in a monotone while I rolled my eyes and sighed again. "Don't roll your eyes at me gorgeous," He said with a grin on his face, tilting my head up and kissing me again, quickly but enough to make me smile.

"What are you going to do about the movie baby?" I asked quietly, sliding my hand to his hip. His body was a distraction, but it was impossible to stop touching him.

He shrugged, watching me as I reached for the book again, fingering through the pages I had book marked. "Are you going to read to me again?" He asked with a grin.

I cleared my throat, “Suddenly, he sits up and tugs my panties off and throws them on the floor. Pulling off his boxer briefs, his erection springs free. Holy cow! He kneels up and pulls a condom onto his considerable length. Oh no … Will it? How?” I bit my lip and glanced at him, both of us laughing at the same time.

"Are you trying to talk me out of it? Because it's working."

I shook my head and tried to bite back my silly grin, "I wanted to read you that one because it was how my thought process went when I saw you naked for the first time."

He raised one eyebrow at me,sporting an amused look on that face I adored. "Did you really think holy cow?" He asked as he struggled not to laugh again. When I shook my head and smirked wider he went on, "I wasn't even wearing a condom."

"True, you never did with me," I pressed my chest against his, wrapping my arms tight around his torso and tilting my head back to stare at him as i kept smirking. "Thank god."

His smirk matched mine as his eyes scanned me, the glint in my eyes giving me away always. "See, that guy and I have nothing in common. Your thoughts must have a been a lot better," He kept going.

"He's a control freak and has a huge penis, you could easily be him," I said seriously, already knowing how the book ended and that was about where the similarities ended. Well, they both preferred kinky sex... but who didn't? "No actually, you're better."

He shot me a smug grin as he cradled my head in his hands, letting my compliments feed his ego which was already as big as his dick. Quite the accomplishment might I add. "I'm sure you're better than that girl too."

"You'll tell me when you'll read the book," I shrugged, pressing a quick noisy kiss on his lips before he grabbed my hips and forced me to get up on my feet. "Are you pulling away from me? Already? Don't you love me anymore?" I asked and faked a huge pout that made him smile like an idiot.

He got up, reaching for the blanket in the process and handing it to me, "You caught me babe." He smirked as he took my hand in his, "Let's go back to the hotel so that I can show you how much I don't love you anymore."