for as long as you're mine, we will stand the test of time

for as long as you're mine, we will stand the test of time by ssaarah 

I looked up at my door, wondering how anyone got past the front door without me buzzing them in. I walked up to it and peeked through my chest getting tight when I saw Milena. I had made a huge mistake admitting my feelings to her…and then an even bigger mistake kissing her. All I could fucking think about was that kiss. I steeled myself and opened the door forcing a smile.

“Bonjour.” She said a little awkwardly as I took in her little dress and high heels. She was trying to kill me.

“Hey…” I replied, blinking at her.

“The mailman let me in.” she replied before holding up a bag. “I brought stuff to make dinner with….I owe you remember?” I nodded slowly. “Are you going to let me in?”

“Oh shit sorry, yeah of course.” She walked past me and I couldn’t help but notice how long her legs looked in that dress….or the way she moved like walking sex.

“Look Ames….I’ve been thinking…about what happened last week.”

“I'm sorry…” I trailed off, not wanting to ruin things anymore than they already were. She shook her head.

“No it’s okay. I'm sorry. I think you’re right, we wouldn’t want to get into something that would probably end and then make things awkward for everyone we know….I want to be friends. Just friends.” Hearing her words made my stomach feel like it was sinking. It was ridiculous, I knew I couldn’t have her and yet every time I was reminded I hated it. What was wrong with me?

“Friends it is then.” I replied, faking my jovial tone I was known for.

"So where can I set up?" she grinned, raising up the bags.

"The kitchen." I teased, smiling at how cute she was.

"What can I do it help?"

 "Nothing, like I said, I owed you. Don't worry, you'll love it." I sighed and took a seat,

"Alright, well I'm sure it will be great… What are you making by the way."

Steak au Poivre with herbed frites." she grinned as she walked around my kitchen gathering pots and pans. "Oh and I made some orange-cardomom madelines for dessert. They are amazing… and so buttery." I smiled and crossed my arms across my chest,

"I didn't realize you were such a cook."

"When I was off finding myself to figure out what I wanted to do when I 'grew up,' she shrugged. “I  took a few cooking classes all over Europe when I was traveling. People like French food,  plus I love my mother and father to death, but they weren't the best cooks. I wanted to learn for myself."

"People in the United States like pizza and burgers. Which is what I ate constantly when I was in school."

"Those classless people." Mila joked. "No wonder the French hate them."

"I know, they're awful." I smirked back at her, "Are you sure-"

"Shhhh!" she interrupted, "Aren't you able to relinquish control to anybody?"

"It's not a strong suit of mine…" I admitted.

"I can tell Mr. Fancy Pants Lawyer. Just relax."

"Fine."

"Okay, good. By the way, these steaks cost me an arm and a leg, so they better be good.”

"What's so special about them?"

"Organic, lean, grass fed beef I think. The Kim and Kanye of cows." She joked and I felt the side of my mouth twitch.

"I'm sure it will be great."

"It will." She winked and I sat back, letting her do her thing.

“I can’t remember the last time I had a good home cooked meal.” I said seriously, watching her hands move as she worked.

“Are you not a cook?” she asked, tilting her head to the side and letting her long hair fall over her shoulder.

“The Alere’s don’t have the chef gene I'm afraid. Except for Chloe, she’s surprisingly good.” Milena widened her eyes.

“Huh, that’s funny I would have expected Ben to be the cook. He’s the one with a kid.” I nodded.

“Well he’s better than me.” I admitted.

“You know he’s on vacation with my sister?” she smirked.

“Together?” I questioned, raising a brow since I wasn’t aware they were back together.

“Well they’re not together, she’s dating someone and I thought he was too….”

“That’s….really weird.” I said seriously.

“Right?” she laughed. “Have you ever been in a room with them? The sexual tension is palpable, they must be dying.” She laughed and I forced a chuckle since apparently I was the only one who noticed the palpable sexual tension that was going on right now.

“It’d be good for Gabe I guess.” I reasoned.

“I miss that little cutie.” She replied, setting something in a bowl and pouring herbs in after it. I smiled back at her and cracked the knuckles on my right hand for something to do before standing up.

“I'm gonna go change out of my suit.” She looked up at me and for a second I thought I saw her pouting but it went away just as fast as it had come.

“Okay.” I walked into my bedroom, stripping out of my clothes and changing into some jeans and a white tee shirt and reminding myself that she wanted to be friends before walking back out. Mila glanced up at me and I watched as her eyes ran down my body. What was she doing?

“Damn.” She said under her breath shaking her head and looking back.

“What?” I asked, looking down at my shirt and hoping there wasn’t a giant stain on it or something.

“I usually only see you in suits….you can really pull off a pair of jeans.” I felt myself start grinning at the compliment.

“You’re one to talk.” I replied without thinking. “I didn’t know chefs wore 4 inch heels.” Milena blushed and bit down on her lip before looking back at me again.

“I'm not a chef.” She said slowly swallowing and then looking away. She cursed under her breath and then made herself busy with potatoes.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, hoping she wouldn’t ask me to help since I ‘d probably just ruin the dinner but she looked up at me, not saying anything for a few moments.

“Its just….” She started, her tongue darting out to wet her lips. “I'm not allowed to think about you like that anymore.” She replied, and I felt my stomach flip as I walked closer to you.

“What do you mean?” she looked up at me, looking so damn beautiful it was painful to look at her.

“If you fantasize about someone enough you actually start thinking it might happen….” She started.  “I'm still getting used to the idea that there’s no chance I’ll ever feel you inside of me.” She almost whispered the last part, the words coming out of her sweet lips in slow motion as I digested them. All my rules were out of the window at that moment.

“Milena…” she blinked and backed away, washing her hands in the sink.

“I'm sorry…I shouldn’t have….I’m sorry.” But I was way too far gone to pretend that hadn’t just happened. I was turning her around in my arms, wrapping an arm around her waist and then on tangling in her silky hair.

“Just one night….please…” I choked out, watching the heat in her eyes pooling as I looked at her.

“Yes.” She whispered. “Please” and then she was grasping my tee-shirt, pulling me down to her waiting lips. I kissed her with everything I’d been feeling for five years, not holding back this time, not running away. Her mouth was so damn sweet and she was kissing me back with a hunger I never imagined could come from her as I pressed her body up against the counter hard, feeling all of her against all of me.

"Oh my god…" Miila breathed out as I trailed my lips down her neck, sucking on it and losing my mind. I couldn’t believe this was happening….how much I wanted it to happen .God it felt right to hold her, kiss her, touch her. I moved my hands to her ass, picking her up and sitting her down on the counter and stepping between her legs to get closer.

"You taste so sweet." I said, pushing her hair behind her ears and then kissing her shoulders, her neck, her collarbone…."I feel like I'm drunk and I haven't had anything to drink."

"Ames…" Mila’s hands tangled into my hair and she pulled me into another kiss. "I need you." She gasped and I nodded, I needed her. I needed her so damn bad. I slipped my hands under her dress and grabbed her underwear, slowly pulling it down her long legs and tossing it away.

"You are the most beautiful woman in the world…" I breathed out, "And you deserve the best…"

"I want you." She spoke against my lips, just making me harder “Please." She begged, bucking her hips forward as she leaned into me, undoing my jeans and pushing them down. I pushed her legs apart, pushing her dress around her waist. Oh god she was so sexy….and then her hands were pushing down my boxers. I heard a sharp intake of breath and I groaned.

"Fuck me." She ordered and I couldn’t help it, I leaned forward, pushing into her wet opening as she gripped the counter. “Oh my god." She groaned. I groaned as I stopped at her entrance, barely inside of her. 

“Not yet….” I shook my head and pulled away from her, letting her eyes fly open.

“No…don’t you dare leave again…not this time….not like this…” I cupped her face and smiled.

“I'm not going anywhere baby.” I said seriously. “But I'm also not going to have a quickie on the counter…don’t you think we deserve more than that?” her face flushed and she groaned.

“Ames…” I kissed her quickly before picking her up, wrapping her long legs around my waist and carrying her into my bedroom where she slid down my body. She turned towards me, running her hands down my chest and then grabbing my shirt, pulling it over my head. “So much better than my fantasies….” She trailed off as she looked at me, making me feel like a god with the way her eyes took in my body. I groaned and reached for her, kissing her hard as my hands found the zipper to her dress.

“You’re overdressed Milena.” I whispered, tugging on the zipper until her dress hit the floor and realizing she hadn’t been wearing a bra and now she was naked in front of me. So much better than my fantasies? Didn’t even cut it. She looked up at me with a wicked grin.

“You’re teasing me Ames…” I groaned and pushed her back on the bed, hovering over her and kissing her lips as my hands found her breasts. Mila moaned and bucked her hips against me, making it so damn hard for me not to just fuck her senseless, especially since I’d already had a taste of how hot and wet she was.

“I want to taste all of you…” I said seriously, pulling back to admire her body again because I felt like I couldn’t get enough. I felt like I’d probably wake up at any second it felt so good to be with her.

“I can’t wait anymore Ames fuck me please!” she moaned, wrapping her legs around my waist and thrusting up against my erection.

“I want this to last…” I trailed off, glancing at where our bodies almost met and she groaned.

“We have all night for that…..” she whispered, breaking me as I angled myself against her body and gave her all of me in one sharp thrust.

“Ames!!!” she called out, her nails digging into my back as I held myself all the way inside of her.  I let out a low curse as I looked down at her….she was tight as hell and felt so fucking good I could barely stand it. 

“How is one night ever going to be enough?” I choked before moving inside of her, my lips going to her breasts as I set a steady pace and she met my thrusts with her hips.

"I don't know…" Milena breathed out every time I pushed inside of her….oh god she was so fucking hot and perfect…

"I'm going to compare every other woman to you…" I trailed off, apparently saying whatever came int my head as I tugged on her nipple…one and then the other.

"Ames…" she breathed out, "You know… this doesn't have to be a one time thing…" I looked up at her and warmth spread in my chest. I didn’t want it to be a one time thing. Fuck the moment I kissed her for real I knew I didn’t…and now that I was inside of her? I was bad for her. But I wouldn’t be able to stop.

"Milena…" I said roughly slowing down to keep myself from finishing, "I can't hurt you… but I can't resist you anymore." And I wouldn’t resist anymore.

"Okay." She looked….taken aback for a second but then she was lifting her head up and kissing me, sucking my lip and tugging on it.

"I imagined this… but this is nothing like my imagination…" I admitted, looking down into her and she grinned, lighting my chest ablaze again. Her smile killed me….

"I hope that means good things…" I nodded and leaned down to press my lips against the sweet skin on her neck,

 "Amazing fucking things Milena…"

"I dreamed about this…" she gasped as I hit the end of her. “Since I was 18 years old…"

" I'm going to have such a big ego after this." I teased.

"Well you fucking deserve it." she said, wrapping her legs around my waist to pull me deeper inside of her, making me groan and thrust upwards into her.

"Fuck Ames!"

“That’s your spot….right there.” I growled, thrusting upwards again and loving the way she gasped and then called out.

“Yes…..again please!” I grinned and gave her what she wanted, groaning as she tightened around me. I moved so I was hovering over her again, her legs still wrapped around my waist, one hand holding her as.s and the other tangling in her hair.

“I’ve dreamed about making you come so many times….”

“So…..so close….oh god…” Mila’s breath was staggered, her eyes cloudy in lust and pleasure. She was so fucking beautiful….and mine. She had to be mine.

“It won’t be the only time tonight baby I promise you that.” My words sent her right over the edge, my name falling from her lips and fuck I loved how it sounded. She tightened and released around me again and again, filling the room with her moans.

“Holy shit!” she breathed out, setting her head against the pillow as she came down from her climax. “Where have you been all my life?!” she grinned and I laughed leaning down to kiss her lips as I cradled her body in my arms.

“Right here.” I whispered against them. I gave her all of me again and she called out.

“Mmmm” she moaned and then pressed her arms against my chest, pushing me onto my back. “My turn to lead.” She grinned, her legs straddling my waist so I was even deeper inside of her.

“I’ve got the best damn view on earth right now Milena….” I groaned, watching the way her breasts moved as she started bouncing on top of me.

“My view isn’t so bad either…..tell me we won’t stop till morning.” I grinned, knowing that wouldn’t be when we’d stop, that I’d need to be with her again and again, but we’d talk about that when the morning came.

“I”ll give you whatever you want tonight…..fuck you’re so tight….” I gritted out, so close to losing it at every second.

"Oh my god." she said, throwing her head back as I gripped her waist and then moved up her body to hold her breasts and then she moved her hands to cover mine. The view was erotic as hell….

"Jeez Mila." I gritted out as I threw my head back and took the sight of her in.

"What?" she asked, cocking her head to the side, her hair falling across he shoulders as her big eyes widened. I almost came right there.

"How do you do that….How do you look so innocent when you're riding me?" I groaned.

"Innocent, huh?" she teased, moving her hips as I leaned up to take her breast into my mouth, no part of me wanting to not touch her.

“Fucking angelic." I mumbled as I sucked on her skin.

"Oh my god." she mumbled out breathlessly once more, "I'm going come again." I groaned. I don’t think I’d ever get Milena saying that out of my head….but I wanted more.

"Scream my name." I ordered, needing to hear it, to ingrain that I was the one making her feel this way.

"Ames." She breathed out.

"Scream it Milena…" I whispered in her ear as I thrusted up one last time, pushing her over the edge and taking me right with her.

"Ames!!!" I heard her scream as I let loose, finishing so damn hard I barely even noticed her nails digging into my chest. "Oh my god." Milena repeated as she collapsed against my body.

"What is it beautiful?" I breathed out as I tried catching my breath.

“Why haven't we been doing this since I turned 18?" she asked me with a light grin. Her skin was glowing and there were slight beads of sweat on her forehead but I don’t think she’d ever looked more beautiful.  

"I don't know baby…" I said, being honest because I didn’t know. All of those reasons that had been keeping me from her? I couldn’t remember them after the most intense sex of my life. She cuddled up next to me, wrapping her arms around my body as I pulled her closer.

"Thank you." she whispered and I looked down at her with a grin.

"For what cutie?"

"I don't know… I just feel like I should thank you." She said looking in my eyes and shocking me since I should be the one thanking her….she…she made everything that felt bad feel good….right…"What about tomorrow?" she asked in a low voice and I wrapped my arms around her tighter.

"Let's not think about this now." I told her, looking deep into her eyes, "Let's just enjoy this, right now." I didn’t know how to tell her I’d changed my mind….I didn’t know if she wanted exactly what I did but I knew right now? I just wanted to enjoy having her in my arms…finally.  

*NEXT MORNING*

I woke up and stretched in my bed, feeling happier than I had in such a long time but then realizing something was wrong. I looked to my left where Mila had been curled up in my arms….but she was gone. I sat up, telling myself to rationalize it, maybe she was in the bathroom or in the kitchen. But when I stood up and slipped my boxers back on I realized her clothes were gone.

“Milena?” I called out. Empty bathroom, empty kitchen…..empty apartment. She was gone. I hadn’t even felt her leave….I shook my head and grabbed my phone thinking maybe something had come up and she hadn’t wanted to wake me…but no messages either. I cursed loudly. I didn’t even get to tell her how I felt, how I wanted more than I’d said….how I wanted to try to be a man she’d deserve…I didn’t want to lose her. Hell after that night I’d barely be able to stop thinking about her. I walked back into my bedroom and sighed. I wasn’t waking up holding her, kissing her until she woke up and then making love to her all over again….and I hated it. It was right when I walked up to my bed that I noticed the note on the dresser.

“Ames,

Thank you for one of the best nights of my life. Let’s just leave it at that, no goodbyes, no awkward talks about how we can’t be together. Nothing sad. We can always look back on it and know it was perfect….and we can keep being friends. Just friends.

Love, Mila”

I re-read it again. And then again. Just friends. I didn’t want to just be her friend. But I’d fucked up…and now it was too late. Nice going Ames.