take your time, think a lot, why, think of everything you've got, for you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not

take your time, think a lot, why, think of everything you've got, for you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not by sassy

I knocked on the door of my dad's office and peeked my head inside before he could answer. "Mr Lindsell?" I grinned, watching him frown at his computer, lost in only god knew what.
He tilted his head up and blinked as he saw me, his grin matching mine. "Mr Lindsell, come in." He said in his usual warm yet silly tone.
I stepped into the room and closed the door behind me before slumping on the chair across his desk. "Did you want to see me?" I asked, running my hands through my hair. When he just nodded, his eyes on my face and studying me as if he could get anything from me just by my expression, I went on. "Why?"

He let out a small laugh as he clasped his hands in front of him, straightening his posture and looking like the successful man he was. Still handsome and charming, my dad had definitely been my idol for most of my life and in a way he still was. "Do I need a reason to see my son?" He raised one eyebrow.
"I don't know, do you?" I retorted and grinned wider, making him shake his head as he shot me an amused look.
"No." He paused as his face turned serious, "But I wanted to talk to you about something-"
"See?" I cut him off before he could say more, loving to make him lose his patience just for the sake of it. I liked the relationship I had with him, it was honest and straightforward, after a few bumps we had met when I was younger, now we got along perfectly. "This was a trap."
He laughed again, "Yeah you caught me."
"I'm listening." I said and gave him a break, my face relaxing as I leaned my back against the chair and looked at him.
"They want you on GQ." He started and I wondered why he was telling me that, it was usually mom who broke the news when they were especially good ones. "Shoot and interview."
I made a face, never one liking interviews since I had always been private but after Gabe I had only got worse. Or better, it depended on the point of view. "I think I'll pass." I said quietly.
He stared at me, "You wouldn't be alone. I'd be part of it too." He said seriously as he leaned into me from across the desk.
At that, I laughed, "Really?" I asked, since the last time I had posed with any member of my family it had been when I was 7.
"They want to write an article about the Lindsell men." He explained with a shrug, not really letting me know what he thought about it.
I processed his words, weighing the options. If my dad was with me? I wouldn't have all the attention on me, plus I was sure that he'd be proud of us. "I don't know, I have to think about it." I said quietly even if I knew I'd say yes eventually.
"They want Gabe too." He added, his lips pursing because he had to know the effect of his words on me.
"No." I said immediately, shaking my head. I was fine with sharing a little of myself with the world but my son? He was mine and 5 only, he wasn't going to end up on a magazine anytime soon. "Never."
“Okay.” My dad nodded, not adding more.
“What?” I asked, reading his facial expressions that gave him away always.
He shrugged. “It’s fine by me Ben I'm not going to push you.”
I folded my arms over his chest defensively and glared at him since I wanted to know his opinion about his. “You’re not saying something.” I said, my lips pursed and making him laugh. I was 25 and my father still didn't take me seriously.
“You’re a smart man.” He replied, pulling out a few tabloids and opening one. “You can’t protect him from this.” He said seriously as he handed it over.
I watched the page marked as “Fun with mom and dad”, there were plenty of semi-famous babies on the page but there was a full spread of my son at the park with me and Cami, the article even questioned whether we were together or not. My eyes widened and then my jaw hardened. “Who cares about this stuff so much?!” I asked, a pained look on my face since I genuinely didn't understand why someone could be interested in a model's personal life, it wasn't like I did something exceptional like saving lives or dominating the world.
He shrugged. “They cared about you when you were little too. Sometimes it’s better to give them what they want under your terms then let them find it themselves and have you not knowing.”
I ran my hand over my hair, understanding his angle but still. “You never did. We weren’t in magazines as kids.” I replied. “Chloe started modeling as a teenager but only because she begged you.”
He winced at the memory. “Yes I remember.” He nodded.
“So then why should I have to exploit my son? God don’t people have their own children to worry about?!”
His grin widened, probably for how easily I got worked up whenever it was about my son. “Probably. But Gabe is the cutest.” He offered, knowing which buttons to push.
I couldn't help but smile, my little man was my biggest weakness. "He really is." I nodded in agreement as I wondered what he was doing since this was his week with his mom. "Thanks to Camille." I added, my thoughts drifting from my son to my ex.
He raised one eyebrow slowly, giving me the same look I got from all my family. They were all the same and while half of the time I acted like it bothered me, I was lucky to have them always worry for me even if sometimes they were a little too much. Mostly Chloe. "You take no credit?" He asked with his infamous grin still in place.
"He looks a lot like me too." I shrugged and dismissed the subject quickly as I dropped my eyes back on the magazine before tossing it back on his desk. "How come mom has folders on us but didn't tell me about this? Her little spying game is neither fair or useful."
His expression turned serious, something I rarely see since he was the kind of dad always playful and in a good mood. I always thought that I got that from him, I was like that with Gabe too. "Give her a break, she's just trying to look out for you two." He defended her like he always did. Not that she really needed it.
I sighed and ran my hands through my hair once again, "I know I know." I said flatly as I stared at him, "But if it happens again? Please tell me since she clearly won't."
His face softened, leaning into me to watch me closely. "I know it's frustrating, but it's the price to pay when you're a successful model." He said offering a smile, always knowing how to make me reason.
"I just want to protect Gabe from the world." I retorted weakly, feeling defeated.
"Now you see why your mom still has your folders." He pointed out and this time I groaned, still not liking the idea.
I rolled my eyes as I leaned back against the chair, "Can we drop that please before I go to mom's office and I burn them myself?" I asked, half joking.
He smirked, "Fine." He agreed, staring at me for a few seconds as if he was studying me. "Let me know when you'll decide about the interview." He said eventually.
"I have to talk to Cami first anyway." I said back, still not sure about it myself but maybe talking to my ex would clear my mind.
“On the vacation you’re taking her on.” My dad replied, smirking at the thought.
“Maybe.” I nodded, looking at his face. “You’re going to say something about it aren’t you.”
He shrugged. “It’s pretty weird.” He admitted and I made a face.
“You’re too old to use the word weird.” I said faking a straight face that made him laugh out loud. He was so easy to distract.
“I’ll remind you of that when you’re my age.” He replied. “Still as nice as it is that you and Cami have developed a friendship? Going on vacation together sounds like more than friends.”
“I just want my family to be together.” I said, borderline annoyed because I swear it was as if all my family was set on telling me the same things.
“Sounds like you want more than a vacation then.” He pointed out before turning away from me to let me know he wouldn’t push me any further. Thank god.
“Mmm…” I trailed off, my brain going blank for a moment. Too much thinking was killing me.
“Have you eaten yet?” He asked and I shook my head. “Good, I'm starving and Ava says she’s at Chloe’s for a girls night.” He paused. “They’re doing that a lot lately.” He said seriously, furrowing his brow as he grabbed his phone and if I knew him I was sure he was texting mom.
“Huh.” I said, running my hand through my hair casually since I was barely listening to him.
“Do you know something?” He asked, raising a brow. “Is my wife trying to beat me as Chloe’s favorite parent?”
I raised one eyebrow at my dad, even though I knew he was just teasing. "You know what, instead of going to dinner with me you should join them, cover your daughter with kisses, compliments, rose petals and maybe even a tiara." I said, smirking wide. No wonder why my sister sometimes acted like a big baby, when she was still treated like one.
"Ha Benjamin, hilarious." He retorted flatly, only making me grin wider.
"Princess Chloe will love it." I went on as I ignored the expression on his face. He could deny until death, but I'd never stop thinking that my parents still spoiled Chloe, not that I was jealous or anything, I was more than happy when all the attentions were on her instead of me and my love life. Or the one I should have.
"She will always be my princess, no matter how old she is." He shrugged as he looked at me, "When and if you'll have a daughter you'll understand what I mean and you'll tell me I had been right."
"Thank god I have a son instead." I kept my smirk in place even though sometimes I genuinely thought that having a girl would have been harder, mostly when she'd grow up in a beautiful woman.
At that he finally chuckle, shaking his head, "And an adorable one."
I nodded in agreement, thinking briefly about the offer he had talked to me about minutes before then drifting to the vacation I was going to take. "You should give me the keys." I said out of nowhere, suddenly remembering that we'd be stay at my family's house.
"Uh?" He muttered unintelligently, furrowing his brows.
"Unless you want me to break in your own home." I shrugged and smirked at me, liking being silly instead of serious.
“Ahh yes.” My dad pulled a key off his ring and handed it to me. “You know there are only two bedrooms right?” He reminded me.
I glared at him, barely remembering the house. “Why would you buy a place with only 2 bedrooms?” I shook my head.
He shrugged. “Ava and I only ever needed one.” He winked and I son groaned as I got up.
“Are we eating please?” I asked. “Before you ruin my appetite completely?”
He laughed and slapped me on the back. “Where to?”
I shrugged. “Somewhere without press.” I groaned under my breath. Part of my so called fame was dued to my career, but most of it? Was because of my parents, mostly my movie star father.
He winced. “So maybe to your place then?” He offered. I sighed, resigned to cook instead of going somewhere nice, and he shook his head. “How Ava and I managed to have a son who hates the limelight? Is beyond me.” He admitted.
“You made up for it with Chloe.” I smirked since my sister was all about attentions.
“But now I have two extremes.” He teased back. “A drama queen and a hermit.”
"At least the hermit won't give you any problem." I grinned, knowing that it wasn't exactly like that but still.
He sighed and shook his head as he opened the door of his office, heads turning once we walked down the hallway. "Getting your 17 year old girlfriend pregnant was enough for a whole life."
I glanced at him from the corner of my eye and pursed my lips together. Now, 5 years later, everything was going as fine as it could, many things had changed and I felt as if an eternity had passed since the moment I had told my dad that I was going to become a dad myself, but I could still remember how hard it had been. "That wasn't the wisest thing I've done, but it turned out being the best one." I shrugged, not ashamed to show how I never regretted having a kid so young and why would I? Gabe was my whole world and I loved him more than myself.
He stopped a second to look at me and smiled, looking as if he was about to say something but then started walking again. "I agree." He said eventually, "Maybe you grew up too fast, but you became a good man."
"Thanks." I smiled back at him, his words meaning so much to me, "It could have been worse, it could have been Chloe." I added, being silly instead of serious. I knew I was trying my best to be a good father, a good man even, but truth was I knew there was something missing and it weighted my heart a lot.
My dad smirked but shook his head. “You and Chloe have much more in common than either of you like to admit.” He told me.
Was he serious? My sister and I were like opposites. “Oh? Have I been wearing tiara’s in my sleep?” I blinked.
He laughed again and ruffled my hair, knowing I’d hate that but doing it anyway. “No Ben though I'm sure you could pull it off.” He said trying not to laugh at the thought. And failing.
“Right.” I rolled my eyes, wondering if I would still be this silly when I'd be his age. “Then what do you mean?”
He shrugged. “Well look at you. You both love the same people, family or not, you’re both driven, but aren’t really living your life the way you thought you were going to. Both a little too vain for your own good.” He teased.
I laughed at that. “We got that handed down from our parents.”
He chuckled. “I'm afraid you’re right about that." He nodded in agreement. “You’re both stubborn and smarter than anyone gives either of you credit for.”
“You’re making us sound better than we are.” I said with a side grin as we walked down the street.
He shrugged. “You’re also both a little lost. But you’re too damn proud to talk to anyone.”
I looked up at him, a wide eyed look on my face since I had no idea of where that came from. And he didn't even know about Chloe. “Are you calling your kids broken?” I asked him since I didn't feel like I was.
He wrapped his arm around my shoulder as he pulled me close to him. “Not broken. Never.” He squeezed me to him like he used to do when I was a kid. I had grown up and I was probably too old for that, but that didn't stop him anyway. I guessed that there were things that never changed, I wasn't complaining though. “You’re a much better man than I was at your age Ben. I cared only about money and girls and I didn’t see the big picture that was life. You found it when you were still a teenager. I barely deserve you as a son I'm so proud.”
I looked at my dad and smirked from ear to ear, his words making me feel proud myself on one hand but on the other? I felt as if he was being a little sentimental, something that my mom loved about him and I found really cute instead. "I'm not sure if I'm getting this right." I teased him.
He finally pulled away as we start walking like normal people again, "Which part?"
"The part where your son is better than you." I said quietly but kept my grin in place, only waiting for his reaction.
"Did I say that?" He asked and furrowed his brows in an attempt to make a straight face. He was a good actor but with me, Chloe or mom? He was an open book.
I nodded my head, not even trying to stay serious instead. "I think you did."
"Huh." He paused before finally breaking into his infamous big grin, "That must be the part you got wrong."
At that I chuckled, knowing that there was no competition really, but appreciating his words anyway because I knew he meant it. "I feel as if Gabriel is already better than me." I said once I composed myself again and called a break from silly time. My son was just perfect, and only 5. I couldn't ever imagine how much more he was going to surprise and make me proud for the rest of my life. "He's so smart, so-"
"He must get it from me." He cut me off before I could go on with the list.
I raised one eyebrow, "I hope it's the only thing he got from you." I retorted and his expression matched mine. "You cared only about money and girls." I said with a hint of sarcasm in my tone, using his own words against him.
"You knocked up a girl when you were 19." He reminded me, but I knew he was just teasing.
"Oh well, no one is perfect." I shrugged and grinned at him.
His smirk turned into a smile, "Let's hope he will be."
“He’s doing well so far.” I grinned, smiling big and I couldn't help it.
“They grow up fast.” He smirked.
“I know.” I agreed as I ran a hand through my hair and shook my head. It felt as if Gabe had turned five in a heartbeat, time really passed too fast.
“It’s too bad you only see half of that…..” He trailed off and I snapped my head in his direction.
“Dad.” I warned since I didn't really need that now. Or ever. Sometimes my family was too focused on pushing me on what they thought was the right path for me to consider how hard it was to stay where I stayed instead.
He held up his hands. “I'm just saying….I would have hated it. I hated leaving you and the girls whenever I’d film and that was only for a few months.”
“And you flew us to your set every time anyways.” I said nodding my head. I still remembered that and how I didn't really like it, that was enough to make my chest tighten. Gabe went through that every week and when he wasn't missing me he was missing Cami. “This is why I'm taking him and Cami on vacation. I want us to be a normal family.”
He shook his head. “You’re not. No family is normal. Hell our family is far from normal.”
“But you’re happy.” I said in a daze, almost not realizing that I was basically admitting that I wasn't. Or at least not completely.
“I am.” He nodded.
"You're lucky." I said quietly, trying to sound causual but failing and sounding kind of sad instead.
He offered me a smile, the kind that told me that he genuinely thought that there was always hope for the future. "You are too, and you'll get even luckier sooner or later." He paused, "You're 25 and you already have a son who's all your life, that's pretty amazing, uh?"
I looked at him, aware that right now we weren't talking like father to son, but like father to father and no one could understand me better than he did. "Yes, I'm thankful for Gabe." I agreed, "I love being a dad, despite all the responsabilities. Only I always have this feeling, that no matter what I give to him I think I could give him more. More happiness, more love, more...everything."
"You're not the only one who feels like that." He said seriously, "Even if you're a grown up man with a son on your own I still feel the need to protect you, or tell you what's wrong and what's right, I worry about you and your sister constantly. I don't think it will ever go away."
"How is that supposed to make me feel better?" I asked, my tone playful since I wasn't able to keep a serious conversation for too long. It was too hard.
He laughed and shook his head, "Being a father is the hardest job on earth."
I grinned back at him, "The best one too."