we're all the same inside

 

"Can we please!?" Gabe asked, jumping up and down and looking like the super cutie and also super spoiled boy he was.

"Please was the magic word little man." Cami grinned. "Let's go pick up dessert for everyone what do you say?"

"Yay!!!! Auntie Chloe do you want dessert too?" He asked and Chloe smiled and reached out to grab her nephew and place kisses all over his little face. "Eww stop it!!" He squealed.

"I do want dessert. Get me whatever you're having."

"Auntie Chloe is a copy cat." I smirked at them.

She shrugged. "I just think Gabe has the best taste." She winked at him and he grabbed Cami's hand.

"Come on let's go!!!" Cami laughed and reached out to kiss me and wink at my sister before our son pulled her out the door.

Chloe slumped on the couch setting her feet on the ottoman in front of her.

"I never knew painting could take so much out of me." She grinned.

We had spent the day painting Cami's new gallery, and I had the feeling she had thought it would be some silly fun work to do when it was real tiring instead, mostly if you weren't too used to hard work.

"Getting old are we?" I teased, handing her a mug of coffee.

"Super." She let me tease her. "It must be worse for you you're even older!"

"Oh yes." I sighed and furrowed my brows, "Speaking of which, did you see where I left my cane?"

She broke into a silly giggle that made her sound 6 and cute all over again, even hitting me with a cushion for full effect. "Oh stop it. You're not that old."

I shrugged, leaning back against the couch and smirking at my sister, "Sometimes I feel 40, sometimes I feel 16."

She kept smirking, her good mood something I really liked and I wondered how much that had to do with the fact that we had spent the day all together and...well. Tristan. "I'm tempted to ask you why but I'm afraid of what you could tell me."

"I feel 40 when I'm tired and my son is throwing a tantrum and Cami is more tired then I am so we're just one frustrated family." I said but I was still smirking, because that only meant that we were a normal family, "And I feel 16 when everyone's happy, I don't have anything on my mind and everything's exciting."

"So that never happens." She pointed out point black before breaking into a laugh.

I poked her side hard, glaring, "It happens a lot more lately instead." I said seriously, thinking about all the things going on with my life. There was still a lot to do but I was slowly and finally getting there.

She went soft and offered me a smile, "I wonder if it has anything to do with the huge engagement ring Cami's wearing."

I smiled myself, because I still couldn't believe I was going to marry the love of my life. "Maybe just a little." I winked at her, "Did you like the ring?" I asked, wanting to know her opinion just for the sake of it.

"It's fit for a princess." Chloe said seriously.

"You would say that." I rolled my eyes and she laughed, because she knew that she was the romantic one in the family...well, the most romantic, since our parents were too.

"I'm happy for you. Also I told you so. A million times I told you so." She added, grinning at me.

"Yes, yes we should all listen to the ever brilliant relationship advice from Chloe Lindsell." I said back sarcastically.

She nodded. "That's right."

"How are you doing Chlo?" I asked, genuinely interested and not at all judgemental. For now. But after what we had been through I really hoped that my sister wouldn't mess things up and that my best friend wouldn't either. As shocking as it might sound, I believed in them.

"Good. Busy with school and work but learning about business is much more exciting than it sounds." She laughed.

"Is it?" I quirked a brow. "Why are you getting a business degree anyways?"

"I want a degree and though I love being a model I only have a few good years left, I'm hoping to stay in the business but more behind the scenes like mom and dad." She admitted and I wasn't even a bit surprised, but I was sure that she had at least a decade before quitting modelling for good. She was still young and she was a lot like our mother, who aged really damn well.

"Mmm." I nodded and shifted on the couch, wondering when would be the best time to tell her about my own plans instead.

"How come you never went back to school?" She asked seriously.

I blinked back at her,  "I had a child to support."

"Yeah but you've been a model for enough time to take a break and get a degree." She pointed out.

"Kids cost more than you think." I said back, because that was true.

She nodded, agreeing for once. "You have a trust fund Ben. We both do. I'm not saying you need a degree to be successful I just know it was something you always wanted. Its weird that you didn't go back to that dream."

I leaned back on the couch, now feeling peaceful enough for me to really stop and look back at my past. I had never been able to do that, I was too worried about the future. "You know Chlo, at the beginning I thought I would. I mean when Cami got pregnant I thought that after a while I'd go back to college, that being a model would be only temporary..." I trailed off, getting lost in my own thoughts.

She gave me a serious expression, something she rarely did, as she shifted on the couch and turned to me, her arm elbow propped on the back of the couch. "What happened to that thought? I know what happened in your life but I've always had a hard time reading your mind instead." She said softly.

I flashed her a grin, "Maybe that's for the best." I joked.

She rolled her eyes, "I'm serious my dear brother of mine."

"I think that life happened." I shrugged, not teasing her anymore, "Time flew and things only got harder. There was a baby to take care of, and then there was the same baby to take care of but without his mom by my side. I knew that both Cami and I acted like responsible adults when we broke up, but we were both heartbroken and all I could think about was Gabe and how I wanted him to have the best possible family even if I wasn't with his mom anymore."

"Oh Ben...I knew how that was for you." She said quietly, offering me a sweet smile as she set her hand on my arm, "I could tell from the look into your eyes."

I shrugged, because now those memories seemed so far. "I forgot about my dreams eventually, I just put them aside because I had a kid whose dreams and future were more important than mine and even if it was hard I don't regret anything."

"You did a great job with him, even when I hated you a little I always thought you were an amazing dad." She smirked a little, setting her head on the cushion behind her and looking at me.

"Thank you." I grinned back at her. "So now you know what happened and why I'm still stuck being a brainless model."

She hit my arm playfully and frowned, "Hey, I'm a model too!"

"You're going to school so you're of course smarter than me." I kept grinning as I teased her, even if I was proud of her going back to school.

She rolled her eyes, but I could tell that she was appreciating the compliment, mostly because if was coming me, the one who never complimented her. Not enough anyway. "I still don't get it completely though. You had the money, you still do, you could have afforded going back to college."

"But what if I needed them for Gabe? What if something happened? Something unexpected? I didn't want to go to mom and dad and ask for their help, they already did so much for me." I tried to explain even though I knew that not everyone could understand the way I thought.

"Benjamin, my brother, the man who worries too much." She said in a silly voice and I groaned, "I'm joking! You've been really responsible Ben. But what about now? You got the girl and can finally have the family you've always wanted...what is it holding you back?"

"Cami's opening her own gallery, we're getting married and we plan on having another baby. And moving to a bigger apartment." I said simply, even if it was far from simple, "Do you think I can take a break of few years to go back to school? I don't think so. I lost my chance and it's okay, I'm a lucky man even without having a degree."

"But what will you do? You hate being a model...and even though you're good at it? It's not fair to take the spot of someone who has a passion for it." Chloes said seriously and I kept my fingers crossed that she wouldn't start giving me a lecture about modeling because I was in such a good mood, I didn't want to spoil it.

"Your therapist has made you too wise." I said, leaning back and studying her with a teasing smile on my face that meant to harm because she was really...growing up. And I gave credit for that. "All these deep thoughts coming out of your mouth instead of talk of parties and boys all the time."

She laughed and shrugged. "Looks like I grew up a little too." She winked at me.

"I've talked about taking over BMM from mom and dad." I said finally because I knew I had to tell her sooner or later, making her smile fade as she looked up at me. I started to tense.

"What?" She asked quickly.

"What part didn't you get?" I asked, giving her a wary look since I was starting to feel nervous already.

"The part where you're saying you don't want to go to school but you want to run a company." She replied, a snap in her voice that I Wasn't expecting. I guess I had been too naive, thinking that we could had this conversation without fighting...it was depressing, mostly after all we had been going through lately.

"Are you saying you don't think I can?" I asked, my eyes narrowing on her.

"I don't think you know how Ben."

"You're right. But I can learn." I pointed out, wondering why everyone believed in me except for my sister.

She shook her head and stood up, pacing the room slowly. "So let me get this straight. You don't want to take money from mom and dad to get a degree but you're perfectly fine with them handing you a company without having any training on how to run it?"

"I wouldn't be doing it alone." I retorted, wanting to get up and leave but this wasn't her apartment so I couldn't. Also we'd have to fix this another time while I just wanted to get things straight one for all.

"This would be a job where you'd have to travel, have long hours, have to go to every party and dinner and gala there is. You hate all those things."

"Why are you getting angry Chloe?" I asked, her behaviour making no sense too me.

"Because you don't even like this company! You hate being a model and that's fine but everytime you say it it hurts me because I love it. Because it's who I am, not just what I do. It's not an easy job, it takes a lot of work to do what we do, no matter how much you say it's just smiling in front of a camera. And if you want to run a company full of people who are as passionate about the modeling industry as I am? Then you have to start treating the profession with some respect."

"Wow." I blinked at her, standing up because all of that pacing was getting on my nerves.

"Wow?"

"That makes a lot of sense Chlo, hopefully I'll have you by my side to help me with those things." I went on, once again trying to be reasonable.

"What?" She asked, looking confused.

I stared at my sister for a long moment, knowing I couldn't just get mad and tell her to suck it up, and I wasn't even really mad...I was sad, and disappointed, because she was so angry and thought I couldn't be do that job. "First of all? Sit down." I said quietly and when she raised one eyebrow at me I pointed at the couch. "You're making me crazy with all that pacing."

She slumped on the couch and crossed her arms against her chest, glaring up at me. "Is this when you start screaming at me? Because if this is what you have in mind, I think I don't want to stay here and listen."

I took a deep breath, exhasperated, as I sat next to her and dropped one hand on her knee, it taking everything to me not to lose it. "I don't want to fight with you, we already fought enough for ten years..." I trailed off, looking at my sister and showing her that my intentions were good.

"Agreed." She said shortly, nodding.

"Let me get a few things straight Chlo." I started, collecting my thoughts, "I never made fun of our job-"

"But you always say-" She cut me off and I cut her off too.

"We are privileged." I pointed out and that was an understatement, "We get to travel all around the world, see beautiful places, we don't have office hours and we get paid a lot. That of course comes with a price too, there's a downside, because it's hard leaving your home and it's hard to spend neverending hours on some flights, it's annoying to be careful about what you eat and it sucks working out even when you don't don't really want to. But come on, we're not miners, most of people have jobs there a lot harder. That's what I think about our job, and even if it wasn't my dream job I learned to love it, because it allowed me to take care of my son without asking for anyone's help."

"I still don't understand why you want to take over the agency." She retorted, going straight to the point as she looked at me seriously, and she seemed less agitated than before, which I took as a good sign.

"Mom got the idea." I confessed, "I thought about it a lot and I wouldn't mind it at all. The fashion industry is what I know more than anything else, because let's be real Chlo, I can't start from anything else from zero since I have to take care of other two people. And believe it or not, the more I think about it, the more excited I get."

She processed my words, shaking her head and pouting a little too. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I needed time to think because believe it or not, I'm not sure myself if I'll be able to do it. I don't know if I have the right skills...you can see me as confident, but I'm just as insecure as you are." I said softly, showing her my real self. We were both adults now and we needed to act like ones, together.

She seemed surprised and her eyes widened a little, "Ben..." She trailed off.

"I never wanted to keep you out of this, if I'm really going to take over the agency is with you by my side. I couldn't make it any other way, I need your support." I paused, leaning back on the couch as I spoke quietly, "You're doing things the right way, and I'm proud of you for that, you're going to school and once you'll be done you'll have all the knowledge you need. You still have many years of modeling because you're gorgeous and you're just like mom, but you'll start taking care of the agency too. I'll have to learn on the field, with the help of mom, dad, Ames, everyone, I can't go back to school. In my mind this could work, you could handle some aspects and I'd handle others...but if you don't want that too? It's a deal breaker for me. If you want the agency all for yourself I'll step back and do something else, that's sure just as it's sure that I could never take over mom's and dad's inheritance without my sister by my side."

Chloe stared at me, wide eyed, a blank expression on her face and her mouth shut. I waited a few moments, until the silence was unbearable.

"Are you going to talk?" I asked.

"I don't even know what to say." She said honestly. "I know that sometimes I speak before thinking and I should have let you explain first." She leaned closer to me and smiled. "If this is something that will really make you happy? Then I'm thrilled. If I was upset before it was because I thought you were taking a dream away from someone else even though you didn't really want it."

"Someone like you you mean?" I asked softly.

She sighed. "Probably. I guess I don't know why mom and dad didn't come to me too." She admitted, shrugging.

"Chloe are you done modeling?" I asked her, trying to make a point there.

"Of course not. I love being a model, for all the reasons you said and more."

I nodded. "Don't you think Mom and Dad know that? That they're happy you've found something you love and would never take you away from that? I am done though, I want to move on, and by the time I'm ready and have learned enough to really take over? You'll be by my side."

"I guess I never thought you'd want to work with me Ben." She admitted.

"Why?" I asked. Okay maybe we didn't always get along, but she knew me, and she should have known that I'd never cut her out of something that belonged to us both. I wasn't an asshole.

"I don't know. We used to be friends, best friends, you me and Cami. But lately you're more like my father and a father that I'm constantly dissapointing. Why would you want to work with someone that you think is awful most of the time?"

"If I was acting like a father it was because you were acting like a child. You're not anymore. And I started calling you awful way before you were actually being awful. It's not serious. Chloe I don't just love you because you're my sister. I actually like you."

"....really?" She asked as if she was having a hard time believing me.

"I like the real Chloe. I'm not much of a fan of the one you were a few years ago, and I know sometimes I'm still worried that you'll turn into her again, but you have to understand what a hell that was for me. You're acting like I just stopped being your friend but you were the one who pulled away first."

"You're right." She nodded, shocking me. "I don't know why I blame you for our relationship sometimes." She winced. "It was mostly my fault."

"We were both to blame. But hopefuly now we're old enough to get over petty problems."

"You really want to go to all the parties and events mom has to?" She asked. "You hate that."

I laughed, because she was right. "Of course not. That's why I have you."

She laughed too, leaning against the couch. "Ahh, I get to do all the fun stuff then." She smirked back at me.

"All the awful stuff instead."

"Awful stuff for an awful girl." She winked, making me laugh again. "Just so you know? I think you'll rock at it. Running the agency. Especially if it's something you're really excited about. Hell you're a top model and you don't even like it. Think of how successful you'll be with something you do like."

"I dunno, my pretty face can't get the paperwork done." I teased, but I was taking her words at heart.

"I'll be too busy at the parties so your pretty face will still have to figure it out."

"I hope I will." I smiled at my sister, feeling even happier than before if possible, "I'm so glad we were able to talk about this without kicking each other's face." I added.

She broke into a laugh, the hearty silly laugh that made her look and sound her age. "It was about time!"

I nodded in agreement, my smile still in place. "I hope that from now on we'll be able to do that always."

"I think we can." She said seriously, looking at me.

I looked at her for a few seconds, debating if bringing up another touchy subject...I was worried about how that would go down instead. But what the h.ell, I needed to tell her. "Prove it." I challenged her eventually, smirking since I didn't want to make the moment too heavy.

"You prove it." She retorted with a silly grin on her pink lips.

"I talked to Tristan." I announced.

She deflated on the couch, her face dropping. "Oh man. Maybe I don't want to prove it anymore."

I nudged her softly, "Come on Chlo." I offered a smile, "You don't even have to talk if you don't want to. But I have things to tell you."

"You said you didn't want to hear of him from me." She pointed out as she gave me a way look and I couldn't really blame her.

I decided to ignore that, because from now on, that was up to her. "Tristan and I are on good terms again. I couldn't really stay without my best friend..." I trailed off and shook my head, "I told him that I'm okay with you two dating or whatever, as long as no one gets hurt in some stupid way." I added but let out the part where he had told me he really wanted to date my sister, because I didn't know in which terms they were right now and I didn't want to stick my nose into their business.

"People get hurt all the time Ben. You and Cami got hurt and it wasn't anyone's fault."

"You're right."

"But look at where you are now. Happy, in love, starting a new life."

"You say that as if you want what me and Cami have." I said raising a brow at her. Of course she did.

She smiled. "Benji, I have always wanted what you and Cami have. Even when we were little I hoped that a guy would look at me the way you look at her."

I smiled at the thought and leaned back against the couch. "I don't want to pry...." I said though I was curious about Tristan.

"We're taking things slow." She smirked, leaving it at that but her face was giving her away.

"By the way you're blushing right now? I don't want to hear anything else." I winced and she laughed.

"Ooops." She smirked. "Have you started wedding planning yet? I want to wear blue I think."

"I don't think that's up to you silly girl."

"I know, but if Cami is talking about wedding colors you could casually slip in how pretty blue is."

"You're awful.....what is a wedding color?"

She laughed. "Oh you're in for so much awesome girly planning. I can't wait to watch."

I shrugged nonchalantly, "Cami's in charge, I'll just be her slave and agree to anything she wants."

"Aren't you going to give her your opinion?" She raised one eyebrow at me since she knew me and how I was.

"I know it's our day, but what really matters to me, more than anything, is that she's happy." I explained, meaning every single word.

"See? Can't you understand why I've always wanted the love you two have?" She said back, half teasing.

"I told her I want one thing though." I smirked at my sister.

She scrunched up her nose, "Is it gross? Because I'm not sure if I want to know."

I laughed, shaking my head, "I want a macarons tower."

"That's all?" She asked back and when I nodded, she let out a giggle, "That's not bad."

"I'm a very reasonable man." I nudged her a little, still smiling. "And there will be things I'll only get to decide about."

"Like what?"

"Like what I'll wear." I answered and in all honesty, that was it.

She laughed again, "You're so bad it will take you forever to pick a tux."

I shrugged, because that could be true sometimes. "I'll have Tristan and Gabe to help me. Dad too probably."

"Sounds like a man date." Chloe laughed.

"Don't be jealous." I smiled, jocking.

She leaned in to kiss me on the cheek. "I'm so happy. Mostly because now Cami will be my sister for real."

I rolled my eyes, almost amused by how she made everything about her. "Yes, I'm so glad my wedding makes all your dreams come true."

She grinned. "Getting my best friend as my sister and having dibs on the best man? Yeah, pretty much my dream wedding."

I quirked a brow at her, "Dibs huh?"

"Assuming he doesn't dump me between now and then." She shrugged, bringing up Tristan again and making me want to dig a little deeper. But just a little.

"You'd have to be actually dating someone to dump them." I pointed out, trying to trick her into telling me more.

"You would wouldn't you?" She agreed.

I nodded and then let out a deep breath. "Leave it to you to fall for my best friend." I said finally, picking my words carefully to see what she'd say back.

She rolled her eyes. "You're one to talk. At least I'm not marrying him."

I laughed. "Your wedding toast is going say I told you so in all the different languages you know isn't it?" I asked.

"See now you're just reading my mind big brother. Careful with that you don't really want to know everything that goes on up here." She said, tapping her head.

I knocked gently on her head instead, furrowing my brows as I faked a straight face. "I can hear nothing. It must be empty." I said before breaking into a laugh.

She let out a sigh, "God you're so silly. How can Cami marry you?" She teased me.

I shot her a significant look, flashing a grin, "Do you really want to know?" I said back.

This time she groaned, "No thanks." She said and paused, looking lost in a thought for a moment, "You and Cami are going to make more babies, right?" She asked, that sounding obvious coming out from her mind. I guessed that it was.

I shrugged, since that was the idea, then again life was unpredictable. "Probably." I answered cryptically, knowing she'd talk about that to my fiancè and get better answers.

"If you'll have a girl, will you call her Chloe?" She asked as she broke into a jokingly smirk, that made her look cute like she did when she was 5.

I laughed and wrapped one arm around her shoulders, squeezing her against my side, "There can be one Chloe Lindsell only."