deep down I know this never works, but you can lay with me so it doesn't hurt

deep down i know this never works, but you can lay with me so it doesn't hurt by ssaarah 

I crossed and then recrossed my legs. I wanted to look sexy...but not like I was trying too hard. I looked down at my lingerie and laughed at that thought. A woman who got naked and waiting for a man in his office? Totally trying too hard. But I was a woman of action and if I wanted any more from Tristan? I was going to have to go for it. My body shivered in anticipation as I heard a key in the lock and then.

Oh my god.

He was with a woman
Fuck.

I squealed a little as Tristan shut the door, the shocked and horrified look on his face was going to haunt me forever. That's just the reaction every woman wants to a man when he sees her mostly naked. Fu.ck what was I thinking?! This was Tristan! I had to make a damn plan so I wasn't ruining plans with harem girl number whatever! I grabbed my dress and got back into it in record time before I heard Tristan come back into his office.
"What the hell was that?" he asked quietly, as if he was a parent chastizing me instead of the guy who rocked my world in and out of his bedroom just a week ago.
"What was that?? That was me attempting to seduce you since you have been ignoring my texts for weeks and now I can see why," I snapped, mostly because I was mad at my self. I knew him, I should have seen this coming. Tristan took a breath and crossed his arms over his chest. It was an innocent movement but god it made his chest and shoulders look so broad, the muscles on hsi arms so sexy.
"I wasn't ignoring you. My aunt passed away and my parents have been visiting me. My mum wanted to see where I worked..." I felt my entire body slowly turn bright red. Seriously I felt like I was being filled with red like a cartoon from feet to head slowly.
"That wass your mother?" I asked, mortification running through me. "She doesn't look old enough to have a son your age. That woman didn't look a day over 40." I said seriously. Tristan smirked.
"Neither does your mother." He pointed out.
"Fuc.k" I ran my hands through my hair and tried to get my stuff together. "Can we pretend this didn't happen?" I begged, wishing the ground would eat me up and spit me out 3 minutes before I'd come into his office.
"Pretend tonight didn't just happen....or we didn't happen period?" He asked, motioning in between us at the word we. I licked my lips....right now in this moment? I'd say forget everything and go back to a time where I was no longer humiliated in front of the one person I wanted to impress.
"I don't know." I said in a softer voice than usual. "I just-" I sighed trying to find my words. "I wanted to find out if that night was a fluke." Tristan walked closer and god I could smell him..so good. So clean and fresh and male.
"A fluke?" I nodded.
"Like....It couldn't have been that good." I almost whispered the words, afraid that I was showing too much of my hand, that I was admitting to feelings he probably didn't feel. The reality was? I'd never been with a man who didn't like me at least as much as I liked him, if not more. Even my one night stands had been with men who were fans, men who told me they'd give up anything for one night with me. With Tristan? I felt one sided....I felt...butterflies. I wasn't used to it.
"That good....." I swallowed the lump in my throat and shrugged.
"Yeah." I nodded, trying to put into words how good it was. How I couldn't remember the last time I'd felt so alive. How I'd rather kiss him than walk a runway...how he had known my body better the first time he touched me than some boyfriends had after months. But that sounded too much, too fast, too soon. Even in my head. He took a step closer to me, his hand moving to my waist to pull me closer and fuck if my whole body didn't light up at the contact. I wanted him to kiss me so badly....
"I've been thinking about this a lot Chloe..."
"And you regret it," I finished for him, seeing the regret in his eyes even as he held me closer to him. I had to pull way, to get away. I reached down to grab my purse of his desk but instead of just letting me leave? He was close to me again, his hand moving to my stomach, making me tense and stand up straighter, waiting for his next move.
"I don't regret it," he said seriously, before silence....and then...his lips were on my neck, kissing a hot trail to the strap of my dress. I gasped, arching into him as I tried not to start begging already.
"Prove it," I said in a whisper as my eyes fluttered closed.
"How?" His voice was raw as he slid his hand down between my thighs then up, up all the way to my pussy where he rubbed his fingers back and forth against the thin lace covering me.
"Oh mon dieu...." I moaned, his touch even better than I'd remembered....and I'd been building it up in my head since the last time.
"Answer Chloe..." He growled against my neck and I swooned. I'd always thought his Aussie accent was sexy but god....when it was growling my name? Almosst nothing sounded sexier.
"This is working." I admitted though I wasn't sure what language I was speaking. I'd never had an issue separating english from french before him.
"Fu.ck....you're soaking. How long were you sitting at my office thinking about fuc.king me?" He rubbed slow circles over my cli.t through my panties and I was desperate for more. Aching. Panting. Ready to beg.
"Only a few minutes..." I rocked against his hand, and finally he slipped a finger past the skimpy lace and into me.
"I thought you told me you weren't going to wear panties the next time we did this...." He said before sucking on my neck, nipping and biting slightly...just enough to leave marks in place of the ones that had barely faded.
"The next time you took me on a date....this isn't a date." I managed to breathe out as I set my head back againsth is shoulder.
"What is this then?" His free hand moved up my stomach to cup my breast through my dress, brushing his thumb to make my nipple strain against the fabric.
"So good....." I whimpered, arching back and moaning as I felt him hard and thick between us.
"Have you done this to yourself since our date?" He asked, pulling out to rub my cli.t before sinking two fingers back into me. I nodded slowly.
"My fingers don't compete..." I admitted my breathing heavy as he pressed his body harder against me, wondering if he too touched himself this week thinking about me. He gave me a cocky grin and it just fueled me on more.
"Don't you cum while thinking about me?" he asked quietly, pumping his fingers slowly and then curling them as my body bowed into him.
"Fuck..." I rolled my head back against his chest. "Yes... So hard." He groaned at my admission, or maybe he just felt how close I was already, with just a few seconds of his fingers on me...in me...but then he was pulling back, pushing my panties down my legs and getting rid of them somehow. His hands were back on me then up my calves, then my thighs, caressing, such a sexy touch I was basically dripping down my thighs I was so turned on.
"Turn around," Tristan slipped back into his chair just as I turned around hsi his hands moved to my hips to set me on his desk. My legs parted on pure feminine instinct, wanting more....wanting HIM.
"Don't make me wait..." I trailed off, lifting my arms up and letting him peel my dress back off my body. Tristan just watched me before letting out a long breath and then moving his head down. His mouth hit my thighs first, teasing me before running up between my legs, making me gasp when he started fucking me with his tongue.
"God you taste good...." He groaned before coming back to me, making me rock my hips towards him. When I had said my fingers didn't compare? It was a serious understatement. Tristan was a master at how to pleasure a woman. Knowing when to speed up, when to slow down, how to pull my orgasm out of nowhere and then back off right before I got it.
"Please..." I begged, frustrated and so close. I leaned back against his desk, watching him as he stopped fu.cking me with his tongue and licked his way up to my cli.t, sucking with expert pressure. "Yes....yes...yes..." I breathed, my eyes fluttering closed as my body tensed up.
"Don't." Tristan pulled back and I looked down at him in desperate confusion. He licked his lips and smirked. "Relax. Right before you cum. Trust me." I swallowed and nodded as he came back to me, shocked when he brought me right back to the edge in record time.
"Fu.ck..." I whispered, fighting my body's natural reaction as pressure built between my legs. I was so close...so close.....so...I felt Tristan moan against me and I realized I had been saying the words out loud....god just one more second and.....I forced my body to relax, afraid my orgasm would leave if I wasn't focused on it but Tristan sucked harder and I broke. The explosion started between my legs, feeling so good my vision went blurry, but then it was shooting up my arms, down my legs into my breasts, and I was literally shaking against him, my pu.ssy spasming. It was like nothing I'd ever felt before. I felt limp and worn out but also hornier than before at the same time. I reached for Tristan's head and pulled him back.
"I am so mad at you for not doing that to me since the day we met." I choked out, reaching down and kissing him hard, tasting myself on his lips as we both groaned.
"I've seen you mad Chloe...this isn't it." He smirked and I grinned as I pulled back.
"I'm going to have to pull out all my tricks to compete with that." I teased as I slid my hands down his torso.
"I wasn't aware it was a competition." he chuckled as he grabbed my wrists before they reached his belt. ".....if I start I won't be able to stop and I need to get back to my mum..."
"That's both flattering and a mood killer at the same time." I threw him a pout and he groaned and kissed me again, his hands groping my body in every way he could. "You're confusing me Tristan...."
"I can't..." he trailed off unintelligently, pulling away again.
"You can, it's easy," I replied, tired of the back and forth. I reached for his hand and trailed it back softly up my legs to show him how wet I still was for him. He rubbed me, making me gasp and then cry out a little when he sunk two of his incredible fingers into me. "So easy.. see," I arched my back again, guiding his free hand down to my breasts to cup me through my bra. He groaned and his teeth caught the lace of it's cup to pull it down and free one breast. He was so hot. The fact that he was trying to resist but couldn't? Even hotter. His mouth wrapped around my breast and I heard little moans coming out of me as he worked me over with his fingers and his mouth.
"I can't Chloe," he said more sternly, with regret even. But I heard the end resolve in his tone. I opened my eyes and tried not to look too dissapointed. I whimpered as his fingers pulled out of me and looked up at him with lust fogged eyes. I could barely do anything but melt when he was touching me..... Damn.
"What do you mean you can't?" I asked finally, pushing through the fog in my brain.
"I need to tell your brother," That killed the mood. I sat up straighter, suddenly totally sobered up.
"You really know how to ruin the moment," I closed my legs fast, readjusting my bra as his eyes washed over me, looking like he wanted to stop me but also like he had to let me go at the same time.
"I'm sorry,"
"For what?" I asked, not ignoring the situation, but honestly wanting to know what he was apologizing for. For sleeping with me at all? Or for not spending more time with me now. He scratched the back of his head as I grabbed my dress off the floor and pulled it back over my body for the second time in this office.
"The mixed messages." I nodded and stood up, pressing myself against him since I felt a pull I couldn't even explain.
"Do you want me Tristan?" He groaned and I felt his erection still pressing hard against it. I had to hand it to him, stopping things before I'd even touched him had to hurt. Literally.
"Yes." I pulled back slightly and licked my lips before I spoke again.
"Not just sexually I mean..." I asked, almost whipsered. Damn it. Cami was right. Everyone was right. I wanted him to like me more than a fu.ck buddy no matter how much I pretended I didn't. I was such a cliche.
"I need to talk to Ben Chloe...this isn't right." I blinked and suddenly felt angry. Not because he wanted to tell Ben, though anything to do with my brother was annoying me lately. But honestly I wanted to come clean too. I didn't like keeping things from him. Even things that would make him mad.
"To what? Ask his permission?" Tristan blinked.
"No I....he's probably going to kick my a.ss honestly. It's not a conversation I'm looking forward to...."
"He's not going to kick your as.s. He basically worships you." I rolled my eyes. "I'm the one he's going to hate. More." Though I couldn't say I regretted it.
"So..."
"So nothing. You can tell him. I think it's going to pretty much officially end this....but there isn't really anything here is there?" I was officially bummed. Not even ten minutes after the best or.gasm of my life. Talk about going from high to low. I thought at the very least we'd have a steamy affair that would be something to remember fondly.
"Don't you realize that there are more people involved in this than just us?" he asked, looking like he was struggling as bad as I was.
"Than us fucking?" I glared since right now? That's all it really was. No matter how extra tingly he made me feel. "No Tristan. No one should be involved in this."
"Your brother is my friend..." He trailed off. "I fucked my best friends sister and you think he's just going to be fine with that? Maybe we're going to be done with when I tell Ben, but my friendship with your brother? That will probably be over too. Do you now get that?"
"So my brother can not only fuck, but knock up my best friend and that's completely fine???" I heard my voice raising but I didn't care. Walls were thick at BMM. "I understand where you're coming from and if you're choosing my brother over me? Then whatever. But the double standards? If Ben stops being your friend over this? Then maybe you both need to grow up because he did the same exact thing to me and I wasn't anything but encouraging." Tristan didn't speak, but did open and shut his mouth a few times as he processed what I had said.
"You have a point," he said finally. I felt myself smiling slightly at the validation he gave before moving a little closer to him as another thought popped into my mind.
"If thats what you thought....if you thought you'd lose your friendship with Ben. I mean I make fun of you guys a lot but you're like friend soulmates. Why would you risk losing that just to be with me?" I asked, suddenly so taken aback my stomach was in knots. "You said no for so long, it wouldn't have been that hard to keep it up." I added, trying to keep things light when they were anything but. Tristan stared back at me, his eyes burning as he shook his head.
"I don't know." he said finally after what felt like ages of silence. It was the same answer I had to why I was so drawn to him. In all respects we shouldn't be right for each other at all. We were opposites, we liked completely different things. But none of that seemed to matter when he was touching me, kissing me...hell even just talking as long as we weren't fighting.
"I'm not pretending that what we have is anywhere near what Cami and Ben have." I said seriously, knowing that that would be ridiculous.
"I know." He nodded.
"But we do have something." I said even softer, taking a deep breath to steel myself for my next words. "Everytime I've felt that something I've run away. I thought it was better to stick to something meaningless, something fun. And maybe that's why I always went after you Tristan, because I thought it would never be anything real." I shrugged. "It's probably not. But for the first time in a long time? I'm willing to try and find out." I walked closer and pressed my lips against his softly, almost melting when I felt him kiss me back instantly. "Let me know if you ever want to find out with me." I whispered, smiling softly at him before grabbing my bag and walking away.