Is this what you call tact? I swear you're as subtle as a brick in the small of my back

Is this what you call tact? I swear you're as subtle as a brick in the small of my back by sassy

"Way to be a good friend." I muttered at Brooke as she opened the door of her apartment, not even bothering to say hi. My bestie had been mia for the last few weeks and while I could accept that if I thought she was with Nick, I couldn't since I had found out that she had spent the weekend in Vegas. With Mason. Without telling me anything.
"Good morning to you too." She glared at me as she slammed the door shut behind her, making me jump a little and surprising me with her obvious bad mood.
"I'm sorry cutie I didn't want to be a bitch." I blinked at her, feeling guilty and pulling her in a hug and wrinkling my nose when I realized that she smelt of vodka. "Are you hangover?" I asked as I pulled away.

so let's end this call, and end this conversation there's nothing worse...

so let's end this call, and end this conversation there's nothing worse... by ssaarah

"Way to be a good friend." Scarlett muttered at me as I opened the door to my apartment not even bothering to say high since I was not feeling well. I had decided to drown my sorrows in drunk VIP status by joining Mason’s entourage at a party in Vegas. I didn’t really know why Scar hadn’t come too, but it wouldn’t have mattered, I didn’t remember all that much of it.

"Good morning to you too." I glared at her as I slammed the door shut behind me, making her jump and look back at me with a questioning glance.

"I'm sorry cutie I didn’t want to be a bitch." She replied, looking guilty and pulling me into a hug before freezing as she pulled me to her.  

i just think we should stay stuck in the moment today

i just think we should stay stuck in the moment today by ssaarah

“Hey Chloe.” I turned and smiled at  Noah, Cami’s younger brother.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, grinning at him. He rose a brow.

“When you’re done with finals and you have an invitation to an event where there’s going to be models everywhere? You go to it.” I laughed.

“How were finals?” I asked, knowing he was in med school and how proud his family was of him. He shrugged.

“No biggie.” I just shook my head.

“You’re cute and smart. How would any model resist you?” He looked back at me and grinned slowly, reminding me of how Cami had said he was still crushing on me.

Days go by feeling broke and tired.

Days go by feeling broke and tired. by pinklipstiiick featuring leather shoes

"All I'm saying is that models stand there and look pretty," Brigitte started the debate for the umpteenth time. Something about winning the genetic lottery and while I agreed, I was tired of hearing it. "But acting? Now acting takes skill."

Okay now he was close, tried to domesticate you. But you're an animal, baby it's in your nature.

Okay now he was close, tried to domesticate you. But you're an animal, baby it's in your nature. by pinklipstiiick featuring leather bags

June 25, 2013

I walked through the door and dropped my keys on the table beside it, fishing my phone out of my pocket as a text came through. My door still hadn't closed before I started texting Scar back, asking her what she was doing... wondering what she was wearing. She'd been on my mind all week, surprising me since I was surrounded by women the entire time. Models, actresses, even a few reality stars and only God knew how desperate those girls were. the try anything once types. Still, I was what Brooke called a "good boy." Honestly, none of the girls there held a candle to Scarlet. 

you see there's leaders and there's followers

you see there's leaders and there's followers by sassy

I tossed and turned on my couch, feeling restless as I held my phone in my hands, waiting for Mason to text me back. After sleeping together, if you could call that sleeping, and a few days of not even a words from him, he had appeared again, telling me he was busy with an exciting trip in Vegas I knew nothing about, then we had been back to our usual flow of texts. I had felt left out, I had to be honest to myself about that, knowing that he was in Vegas with Brooke and other people while I hadn't been invited, and it didn't matter if he tried to make up for that last minute, it had been too late.

i don't wanna take it slow, let's not take things slow

i don't wanna take it slow, let's not take things slow by ssaarah

I walked into Jac’s place, picking up her and her sister for the birthday party we’d planned for her. I was nervous as hell, I needed Alyssa to like me and although I never really had a problem with teenage girls liking me? This was a little different. Though when I walked in I saw Jac and her sister hugging tightly. I tried not to let my mind wander since I knew her sister as only 18, but damn she was almost a carbon copy of Jac just…shorter. I tried to think about anything other than two Jac’s before they pulled away and her sister looked at me.

"And now it makes sense... the real reason why you're staying here and won't come back home," She whispered a little loudly making me grin a little.

"You must be Alyssa," I smiled at her, walking up to them. "I've heard a lot about you."

"I'm sure it was all good," She said cockily and grinned a perfect smile.

“Of course.” I grinned, shocked at the similarities between them. She looked me up and down and whistled.

“You are one tall drink of water aren’t you?” she asked a big smile on her face as Jac turned red.

“Lys.” She chastised as I laughed.

All day, all night, maybe I'm addicted for life, no lie.

All day, all night, maybe I'm addicted for life, no lie. by pinklipstiiick featuring louis vuitton

"You live here?" Lys asked, her voice more twangy than I'd remembered. Of course we still talked on the phone every other day, but she sounded so different now that she was here... and good god, she grew about five inches since I'd last seen her.

sometimes, I still need you

sometimes, I still need you by sassy

flashback;

I pushed the front door open then closed it behind me a second later, listening to the silence of Cami's apartment as her unmistakable scent filled my lungs, causing an ache that I felt everytime I had her close enough to remember how much I had lost. I walked straight to Gabe's room with my heart heavy, happy to see my boy during a week night, but not as happy that I was having that extra time with him because Cami was going out on a date. It had been a year since we broke up and she was still in my life for obvious reasons, I was glad that we were working on building a friendly relationship for our baby's sake and I had thought that time would have made things easier eventually but no. I still loved her and after a few casual hookups, an attempt to date gone bad, I was in a phase where I didn't feel the need to be in any relationship, physically or emotionally, with any girl.

Sometimes, I still need you.

Sometimes, I still need you. by pinklipstiiick featuring strappy sandal heels

(flashback)

I listened as the front door opened then closed, grabbing my clutch from off my bed as Ben went straight to Gabe's room. It'd been a full year since we broke up, I was thankful that he was still in my life while the rest of me broke down a little every time I saw him. I still loved him, a part of me knew that I always would. One random hook up and a somewhat serious relationship later, it still hadn't gotten easier. Dante helped a lot... I mean, he was gorgeous, successful on paper, and treated me like a princess. What more could I ask for, right?

this is who I really am I inside

this is who I really am I inside by sassy

"He wanted me to wear white." Finn said seriously, shaking his head in disapproval, "I told him that I couldn't, I'm not a virgin anymore."
"Oh dear god you two are going to kill me." I laughed, setting my hand against his chest casually. I had known Finn since forever, we had met first at some party when we were both at the beginning of ours careers and when, a few months ago, he had asked me to plan the reception of his wedding I couldn't have said no.
“Jules our reservation is in 10 minutes.” Trey cut in the conversation as he walked over us, his tone cold and his eyes glaring at my friend.

i'm so tired of these blurred lines

i'm so tired of these blurred lines by ssaarah on Polyvore

I swallowed thickly as I watched Jules laughing at something the man in front of her said. She set her hand against his chest as she chuckled and mine tightened as I walked up to them.

“Jules our reservation is in 10 minutes.” I said coldly, giving this guy a glare. She nodded.

“I'm ready, Finn this is…this is Trey my….” She paused and I jumped right in.

“I'm her boyfriend.” I said seriously with an edge to my voice I didn’t bother to hide. Jules looked up at me and I wasn’t sure if she was upset I had already labeled us or if she realized my discomfort at the situation in general.

“I was just talking to Finn here about his wedding. I felt my face soften as I looked back at him.

“Wedding? Congratulations.” He nodded.

TLC || I wanna scream I love you from the top of my lungs, but I'm afraid that someone might hear me.

TLC || I wanna scream I love you from the top of my lungs, but I'm afraid that someone might hear me. by nadiaa featuring supra shoes

I walked in to what I could assume was Scarlett's apartment. Brooke had forgotten to tell me, but I assumed with all the people going in and out that this was where the party was. I pushed the door open and I walked into the packed apartment, not knowing anyone. Although, this Scarlett must have had lots of friends…

I spotted Brooke and some other chick, probably Scarlett and I walked over to her, "Not here yet, I guess-"

I wrapped an arm around her waist gently so not to scare her, "I don't think I've ever seen this many people in an apartment before." I smirked and turned towards Scarlett, "You must be Scarlett." I grinned, offering her my hand, "I'm Nick."

in the middle of the night, when the angels scream, I don't want to live a lie, that I believe

in the middle of the night, when the angels scream, I don't want to live a lie, that I believe by sassy

I leaned my head back against the seat of my car, glancing at my watch nervously as I waited for Aria in front of her house in LA. Since I had landed in Chicago and met her at the airport I hadn't spent more than five minutes off of her, not on the flight to Los Angeles, not in the car that had taken us to her place, not even a second since we had closed the door behind us. The last day had passed fast, I was too lost in her and happy to have her back in my arms for good this time, the only time I had given her to herself were the few hours I had left her sleep but still glued to my body. I had wide awake and restless instead, it had been weird for me to spend the night at her home and I had agreed only because that idiot of Gavin was out of town and because I didn't have a home there anymore, but it wasn't just that which made me nervous, I had other reasons too.

I can feel the madness inch by inch.

I can feel the madness inch by inch. by pinklipstiiick featuring a gray shirt

"It was about fucking time," Seb groaned as I finally climbed into the car, having only left him waiting for ten minutes tops. His head was leaning back against his seat and his eyes were on his watch, impatient as always. Okay, maybe I took fifteen minutes, but still.

I glared at my grouchy boyfriend, slamming the door closed a second before he started the engine. "It's not my fault if it took me forever to cover your signs on my neck. Or do you think that your family would love to see how passionate you are about me?" I retorted with an eyebrow raised as I fastened my safety belt.

So take this wine and drink with me, let's delay our misery.

So take this wine and drink with me, let's delay our misery. by pinklipstiiick featuring black platform heels

(flashback)

The front door slammed shut as I reached for the bowl of popcorn, popping a few kernels into my mouth while trying not to count all the calories the tiny bowl full of gooey butter contained. I'd go back on my diet tomorrow, I just needed a break from all the veggies. "Ben?" I called out as a tall figure walked past the doorway to the living room, giving me a fright since Corey was out of town on location filming and I could have sworn Ben said he was staying at his friend Regan's, I knew well enough that it was code for he was spending the night at Camille's though. How he managed to sneak out of Harper's house sometime in the early morning before her and Miles woke up? It beat me. I knew what our kids were up to and while I was still convinced they were too young to have sex? I had to be thankful that Ben had chosen probably the best girl I'd ever be able to pick out for him... not just that, but what they had was so genuine and innocent. I could recognize love. After being in love with my own best friend for more than 20 years? I saw the same in my son and his girlfriend every time I looked at them... and that was why I put all of my trust into them and the decisions they made.

here our dreams aren't made, they're won.

here our dreams aren't made, they're won. by sassy

 flashback;

The front door slid from my hand and slammed shut behind me, leaving me cussing under my breath. My day had already been hard enough, I didn't need to wake my mom up and face her too. I loved her, I really did, despite being already 19 I still felt a mommy's boy at heart and how couldn't I when she was always so amazing and understanding to me? On the bright side dad was out of town, busy with filming or something like that. I could deal with mom, dad was harder to fool.
"Ben?" She called out as I walked past the doorway to the living room.

feels so good to be bad

feels so good to be bad by ssaarah

“Here’s the birthday girl!” I exclaimed, pulling Scar into a hug as she grinned.

“The cupcakes are amazing. I'm so happy you managed to make them alcoholic too.” She winked and I chuckled.

“Yes I'm very talented.” I grinned, leaning in and giving her a kiss on the cheek.

“So where is he?” I bit down on my lip and shrugged.

“Not here yet I guess-“ and then I felt an arm wrap around my wait.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen this many people in an apartment before.” Nick smirked and turned to my friend. “You must be Scarlett.” He grinned, offering up his hand. “I'm Nick.” She nodded, looking him up and down and smirking.

if our love's insanity why are you my clarity?

if our love's insanity why are you my clarity? by ssaarah

“Hey baby.” I set my work bag on the counter and reached into the fridge for a waterbottle before joining Vi on the couch. Things were….well they were still strained. I was still set in my belief that she had ….”proposed” for all the wrong reasons, and she was still sure that I was rejecting her. But she was wrong and it was the one thing I was sticking to. I’d bend over backwards for Vi but this wasn’t about us or our love. It was about her damn insecurities and that wasn’t a reason to walk down the aisle.

“How was work?” I shrugged and pulled her into me so she was leaning against my shoulder.

“Same as usual. Did you know American idol is thinking about hiring judges from past American idle seasons next year?” Vi smirked, I’d always come home with a new piece of gossip from our celebrity section of the radio show I did. She was always amused, more because I had to admit, some of the stuff was kind of fascinating.

“Oh good, now they’ll have something to do.” She joked and I chuckled as I kissed the top of her head.

this is a portrait of a tortured you and I

this is a portrait of a tortured you and I by sassy

“Hey baby.” Jake set his work bag on the counter and reached into the fridge for a waterbottle before joining me on the couch.
I watched him from the corner of my eye, admiring how handsome he looked in his works clothes, but then again, he always was. Still, that wasn't the reason why I was so in love with him, why I wanted to spend the rest of my life by his side, he was an amazing person and, no matter if he disagreed, he was just perfect. Things were still complicated between us, but I knew that I'd never let him go for any reason. “How was work?” I asked eventually.
He shrugged and pulled me into him so I was leaning against his shoulder. “Same as usual. Did you know American idol is thinking about hiring judges from past American idle seasons next year?”

They can live the life they define.

They can live the life they define. by pinklipstiiick featuring a p c jeans

“Where the hell is the other model?”

“She was here 30 minutes early, we finished her and sent her to wardrobe.”

“They weren’t ready for me yet," Chloe chipped in with a smirk on her gorgeous face, tying her robe only after I caught a glimpse of the lacy lingerie she had on. I had to resist the urge to groan, telling myself that I was immune to stunning women in lingerie... which really, I was around on a daily basis and should be used to by now. I was only a man though. “Who am I shooting with?”

if you fall for me, i'm not easy to please

if you fall for me, i'm not easy to please by ssaarah 

“Where the hell is the other model?” I heard Tristan’s deep voice as I walked past hair and makeup.

“She was here 30 minutes early, we finished her and sent her to wardrobe.” I peeked into the room and smirked. I should have felt insulted that Tristan thought I’d be even a minute late but I was more excited by the look on his face when he found out the opposite instead.

“They weren’t ready for me yet.” I chipped in making sure to tie my robe over my lingerie a second after Tristan looked over hoping for even a tiny reaction….but no. “Who am I shooting with?”

and we can live like this forever it's fine by me

and we can live like this forever it's fine by me by ssaarah

I sighed as I finished the last chapter of my trashy romance novel, epically cheesy but that was honestly just the way I liked it. I had traded in my Cinderella stories for steamy romances but the gist was still the same.

“Finish another one?” Cami asked, smirking at me as I set the book down. I shrugged.

“I'm a fast reader.” Ben had asked Cami to stay with me today, as nice as it was to not have my secret held inside he was being even more protective than usual. Luckily Cami was the complete opposite, sure she was protective but in a best girlfriend kind of way, not an impatient older brother kind.

“You’re a hopeless romantic who masquerades as a player.” She pointed out seriously. I groaned.

“It’s not my fault if no one wants to have an epic romance with me.” I said in an overly dramatic voice, winking at her. “You know now I had enough drama in the one romance I had.” Cami winced but pushed past it. Originally? She had been hurt I hadn’t told her, hurt that she couldn’t have helped me. But I think she understood a little more than Ben. Your first love? It’s hard to see his flaws, even if they’re literally hitting you in the face. We hugged, we cried, and I think she knew me better, but she wasn’t going to dwell on it because I couldn’t dwell on it.

“You choose guys who don’t want any romance instead.” She replied, fanning her toenails with a magazine. I tilted my head to the side.

“You know you’re using my face to dry your nail polish?” I asked, and she looked down at a Benetton ad I had done earlier this year.

“You’re so useful to me.” She teased. “But don’t change the subject.” I shrugged.

“I can’t help it if I'm drawn to bad guys, how do you change that? Look at me now I'm obsessing over the one man who actually hates me.” I sighed. “If only he wasn’t so fucking hot!”

Shake it like a bad girl up in Harlem.

Shake it like a bad girl up in Harlem. by pinklipstiiick featuring ballet shoes

“Finish another one?” I asked as a loud sigh escaped Chloe, smirking at her as she set the book down. It was another one of those trashy romance novels, the ones complete with a long haired hunk on the cover and a busty vixen in his arms.

She shrugged, “I'm a fast reader.”

“You’re a hopeless romantic who masquerades as a player," I pointed out seriously, glancing at my friend.

with buried heads we both forget, all of the past and its regret

with buried heads we both forget, all of the past and its regret by sassy

Monday, May 27th; Night of Museums; enjoy a night of lights, guided lecture tours, concerts and even treasure hunts. Bring the family or bring a date... up to you.

I ran up the stairs two at time, trying to be as fast as I could and staring at the top of the staircase of the main entrance of the Louvre in an attempt to stot Gabe and Cami. We had been planning this night for quite a long time, both Cami and I agreeing that it was time for our son to start learning something about art and history but still in a fun way of course. Our little man had approved our choice in the moment when I had mentioned that there were mummies and a special tour in the basement, making it sound more like disneyland than a real museum.

With buried heads we both forget, all of the past and its regret.

With buried heads we both forget, all of the past and its regret. by pinklipstiiick featuring crop tops

"What do you think it'll be?" I tried again, my eyes bouncing back and forth between Gabe's pout and the piece of paper he held. For a Monday night, the Louvre was already packed, people passing by us in large groups but none of them holding the one person we were waiting for.

He sighed loudly and shrugged his tiny shoulders, folding the paper and shoving it into his pocket, "I don't know maman."

cause with your hand in my hand and a pocket full of soul I can tell you there's no place we couldn't go

cause with your hand in my hand and a pocket full of soul I can tell you there's no place we couldn't go by sassy

Kori set her palms on the counter on either side of her, crossing her legs and watching me and Coulter carry the last of the boxes inside our new loft. "Is that it?" She asked and smiled, Coult wiping the sweat off his eyebrow.
There were over 50 boxes in all and some of those weighed a tone, I wasn't even aware of having all those things in my apartment, but I had to say that since Kori had moved in with me there had been a lot of additions.
"Is that it?" He raised an eyebrow, "Do you not realize how many boxes we just brought up? How six of them alone were marked 'Kori's shoes'? Big boxes might I add."
She frowned, "I liked shoes."

This heart is burning up.

This heart is burning up. by pinklipstiiick featuring rock and roll t shirts

I set my palms on the counter on either side of me, crossing my legs and watching Noah and Coulter carry the last of the boxes inside our new loft. "Is that it?" I asked and smiled, Coult wiping the sweat off his eyebrow. There were over 50 boxes in all... I had no idea where all of that stuff came from, but I guess that combining Noah's entire apartment plus everything I'd accumulated while living in Italy? It was a lot.

"Is that it?" He raised an eyebrow, "Do you not realize how many boxes we just brought up? How six of them alone were marked 'Kori's shoes'? Big boxes might I add."

this is a girly looking set but i don't care ;)

this is a girly looking set but i don't care ;) by ssaarah 

"It was about f.ucking time." My nephew muttered under his breath as he opened the door to his place. I smirked at his choice of words. Ben always did have an attitude problem. At least that’s what Ava called it when we were growing up.

"Language Ben, there's a kid here for f.uck's sake." I whispered as I grinned at him, not even bothering saying sorry for being late because I was barely 15 minutes and that was early for me if I had court. Ben groaned but smirked eventually, taking the carton boxes from my hands as he made his way to the kitchen,

all we need is faith, faith is all we need

all we need is faith, faith is all we need by sassy

I opened the door and glared at my uncle...well, Ames. "It was about fucking time." I muttered under my breath as I let him walk inside my apartment.
"Language Ben, there's a kid here for fuck's sake." He whisper as he grinned at me, not even bothering saying sorry for being late. Fifteen minutes only, but still.
I groaned but smirked eventually, taking the carton boxes from his hands as I made my way to the kitchen, "Hilarious." I said flatly, not in my usual good mood. Truth is, I had a lot of my mind, but I was genuinely happy to have him here with me and Gabe.
As if on cue my perfect son appeared from the livingroom, running of course. "Uncle Ames!" He said with enthusiasm, always loving being surrounded by people, mostly because he got spoiled even more. As if he needed that.
"Hey big boy." Ames grinned at him, messing with his hair, "What's up?"
"Is it true that we're having pizza? Papa never lets me eat pizza." He asked seriously, giving me a look before smiling at my friend. That wasn't enterely true, I made exceptions sometimes, like tonight.
"Never? Lies again Gabriel?" I raised one eyebrow at him, grabbing him by his waist to set him on a stull by the kitchen island. I didn't know what was with lies lately, it wasn't like he lied about important things, but he definitely did to take advantage of some kind of situations or to get his way. He was a smart kid, a little tricky too, but at least he never got me bored, he was a living entertainment.